Her Secret

ten | roadtrip?

After agreeing to complete the bucket list with Zach, I head inside while thinking of ways to actually get this done.

I mean, it's not like my parents will let their deathly ill daughter disappear on a road trip until she has to be at the hospital for chemo and radiation. Especially because I'm supposed to see Dr. Weker every Saturday until it starts, as well as all of those stupid therapy sessions I would be missing.

What would they think if I just took off? Would they think I was running away? Would they be drowning in worry for the next two weeks until I came home?

Zach decided that it would be more efficient if we completed the list while on a road trip, considering that a road trip is #12 on the list.

Maybe I could only tell Dylan what I plan to do. I know it's an incredibly selfish decision. I mean with everything they've done and put up with for me, how could I even be considering taking off like this? They're going to be worried sick.

And what if I don't make it much longer? This chemo and radiation is going to drain me. My last two healthyish weeks would be away from my family. How is that fair?

Feeling completely torn in half, I decided to talk to Dylan. He can hopefully help me deicide what to do.

Knocking on the door to his room I call his name "Dyl?"

Yelling out to me to open the door I do and see he is playing video games with Daniel, Noah, and a few of Dylan's friends, while Zaina is laying down looking bored out of her mind.

I almost smile, it's just like old times. Except without me.

Trying my hardest not to stumble on my words I say "Oh sorry, I didn't realize you had people over. I'll come back in a bit."

Noah, Daniel, and Zaina look like they have a lot more to say, probably all of the angry feelings I have caused them to feel, but they somehow hold back. Probably because of Dyl.

Dyl must see the look on my face, the look of indecision and stress. Only my twin can read me this well. Which is why just as I'm turning to leave he says "Lee! Wait up."

Dylan jogs up to my in the hall, throws an arm over my shoulder and tells me to lead the way.

Leading him to the backyard, I rest on my elbows letting the last bits of the warm Canadian sun blanket me while Dylan does the same.

"What's wrong Lee?"

That's all it took for me to pour out what's been happening. The project, Riley, Jude, Zach's mother, Zach, and lastly the list.

"He asked me to go on a road trip with him Dyl, for maybe two weeks? I'm not too sure. The things on the list seem like a lot of fun. Things I would have done before I got sick. But how could I go? Leave the family? Miss my appointments? Mom and dad would kill me. I mean I don't even know why I-"

"You should go."

Looking at my brother in complete shock I stumble on my words as I question him "W-what? Dyl did you hear me? Two weeks with Zach. A road trip, right before my chemo and radiation!"

Dylan's face remains completely serious as he says "Let me rephrase what I just said. You need to go. I heard you Lee. Two weeks. You have two weeks until you feel like complete shit again. I saw what the first round did to you, okay. It drained the remaining life out of you. Going on this trip might just give you the the energy to get through it."

Not knowing what to else to say I ask "But what about mom and dad? And my meds? What if this trip takes too much energy out of me. What if I run into a problem and we don't have a hospital close by. Wh-"