And you decided whether you saw beauty or destruction

What we leave unspoken

(Superhero and vigilante)

This one's for "GreatestTheAuthor" on ao3

Having a crush on the hero of the town was something many people had to probably deal with. Having a crush on a classmate was also a common occurrence.

Having a crush on someone who was both of those things was hard, particularly if you, like Connor, knew that they were in fact the same person.

Even since Connor discovered Cedar's secret identity, as the boy of his dreams, the two had become friends, which meant Connor worried; Connor wasn't used to worrying.

Generally his job of getting people away from danger, and protecting them while at it, kept him busy enough that he didn't think about anything else, but when everyone was out of trouble he would be attacked by worry, so he would get himself into even more work.

Because Evan was his friend, and the two were really close by now, he worried for Connor too, but he was better at dealing with them; granted Connor wasn't the one fighting to the death with super people, though he did risk his life saving the day in other ways. But Evan noticed how exhausted Connor had become, and tried to get him to fess up.

Caring about someone when you were a hero meant that they were in danger. But Evan had told him, during that first meal together, after the whole identity spill, that it would be ok.

"I mean, you can't be prepared for a threat you don't know exists"

"Are you sure you're an Environmental major?"
"Shut up, we take English together"

Connor had smiled in amusement and Evan had rolled his eyes before smiling back. Connor was so gay.

Connor is still extremely gay, especially for smiling Evan Hansen, especially for the way Evan smiled at him, yeah, especially for that.

They're putting their lives on the line, and one day he'll have to say it, and that day might mean the end of everything he's built with Evan, or the start of something good. Connor hopes for the second, but feels like the first is more likely, so he procrastinates it, finds a million and one reasons not to do it yet; he'll run out eventually, he knows this.