My Messy Life

Chapter 4

I woke up the next morning with the worst headache I'd ever had. I think I'd rather feel hung over than like this. My neck was tight and my head was just pounding from all the stress. I thought back on last night and all of the things Brandon and I had said to each other. How was it possible for him to just shut his feelings off like that? How could he just play with me and then push me away?

Stupid men!

I threw the covers off me and got dressed quickly. I had class today and I was hoping I could just pass the day without seeing Brandon or Erica. I didn't want to talk to her about catching her cheating and I sure didn't want to talk to Brandon about it either.

I grabbed something to eat, grabbed my book bag and quickly headed out to class. I looked back on the last few weeks and thought about how much my life had changed. I made a promise to myself that in coming here I'd be more open and adventurous. I think that getting drunk, getting attacked at a bar, flirting with my roommates boyfriend and getting my own boyfriend classified as some serious change in lifestyle.

I opened the door to my classroom and found a set at the end of an isle in towards the middle of the room. Adventure or not, I still cared about my grades. I took out my homework, book and notebook for this class and started reading the text the teacher had written on the chalkboard in front of me.

A few minutes later as class was about to start and I felt like someone was watching me. I lifted my head to look around but I didn't see anyone looking in my direction. All through class I just couldn't shake the feeling of being watched. I gathered my things so as soon as the bell rang I could leave.

About two minutes before the bell rang the person behind me kicked my chair on accident, causing me to turn around and look at them. To my surprise it was Brandon. He just looked right through me and got up to leave just as the bell rang. I watched him take a few steps from me and before I knew what I was doing, I'd grabbed my things and ran after him.

"You're just going to pretend I don't exist now?" I pulled on his shoulder to stop him and he just shrugged me off like I was nothing.

"How can you just turn it off and act like it was nothing?" My question came out softer than I'd expected it too and it caught him off guard. I could feel the tears threatening to spill but I remembered the promise to myself. I was going to be stronger.

Brandon turned to look at me and his face was hard with anger. I scowled at him as he closed the distance between us. He grabbed my arm and moved me forcefully I might add to a more private spot. I knew he was going to yell at me, so I braced myself for the worst. He pushed me towards this small alley way and he blocked my only exit.

"You want to talk? You want answers huh?" He moved towards me but I took steps back to keep him away from me. He obviously wasn't in the best of moods and I'd never been around that kind of anger before.

"Not if you're going to act like this. I didn't do anything to deserve this. I was being a good friend in telling you about Erica. I'm sorry if it made you made at me but." He cut me off with his lips against mine. I felt my lips split back open from the force and winced slightly, moving back from him. Brandon's face was angry but the second he saw me move my hand to my bloody lip, the anger was replaced with worry.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. Let me see it." He reached out to grab my chin and I swatted his hand away from me, catching him off guard.

"Don't. You can't be an asshole and then sweet whenever it's convenient. Why did you kiss me and why are you treating me like I killed your dog? I didn't do anything to you."

"Yes, you did. You can't see it but you've done so much to me already. I was fine before you came. Yeah, Erica and I aren't perfect but I was fine with it and now you've made me." He turned around and started walking away from me. How could he just stop talking in the middle of a sentence like that?