Live Through This ---Frerard Fanfiction

Chapter Four: Dead

<AN>THIS IS NOT THE END OF THE STORY!!! THERE ARE STILL MANY CHAPTERS YET TO COME, AS WELL AS AN ALTERNATE ENDING.  THIS IS NOT THE ENDING</AN>

Gerard's POV

I felt my heartbeat getting weaker and weaker. I couldn’t speak and could barely move. I tried to tell the nurses to stop, and that treatment was killing me, but they were walking away. How were they oblivious to the fact that my heart was irregular? Maybe they thought that this was normal for me, since my heartbeat had a different pattern every time Frank walked in.

Using the last of my strength, I felt for the tube in my left arm. I found it, and tried to enclose my fingers so I could rip it out of the back of my elbow. I succeeded, finally, but it was too late. My heart was failing. The tube in my neck restricted my movement, and if I were to rip that out, I would bleed out. I reached out and-

Fuck. I was too far away. If this hospital was so great, why did they move my bed away from the nurse’s button? There was a sensation by my knee. The remote. I couldn’t sit up, so I had to contort my body to pick up the remote. Finally, as my heartbeat got weaker and weaker, I got it. I threw it at the button, and two nurses ran into my room. I pointed at the monitor before the control was taken from my body. I was paralyzed.

The monitor flatlined, but I could still hear everything. I then realized that I was watching myself from the other side of the room. A figure in a dark cloak floated above me. I saw something being taken from me. Light.

“Get away from me!” I screamed. The creature ignored me and continued. Nobody heard me, but I kept yelling. “Go away!” I walked over to it and through one of the nurses, who was trying so desperately to revive me. I tried to push it away, but my hands just passed through it.

Everything in the room disappeared except for my lifeless body laying on the bed. The room was dark besides the one light behind my dead face. I heard a doctor’s voice echo across the room.

“Time of death: 10:13 a.m.”

The light faded and I was left alone in the dark. There was a clicking noise coming from somewhere, like on old film reel. I saw me as a baby with my parents. I was walking around, stumbling just a little. It skipped a few years to the day my baby brother was brought home. I looked down and into his carseat and got the biggest smile on my face. I was now at school, and the kids were shouting terrible things at me. They were kicking me on the ground. A boy with dark brown hair came to my rescue. He slammed the leader of the pack against a wall, despite how tiny he seemed. He then helped me to my feet as a few teachers ran to us.

Frank was at my house, and we were playing Scrabble. I reached over the board and my sleeve slid upwards. He saw all my scars and got a very serious look on his face.

Frank gently took my hand and pleaded, “Please don’t do that to yourself. I promise I’ll always be here no matter what.” We then hugged as the next memory turned up. I was in the doctor’s office, trying not to cry. I took out my phone to call somebody. This was only a few weeks ago.

The last memory was of Frank and I Laying together in the hospital bed. I felt the sensation of his hand in mine. I smelled the scent of coffee and cigarettes. We just sat there for a while before the image faded. A woman walked up to me in a dark cloak, but her hood was now down. She seemed to glow slightly.

“Gerard Way,” she whispered. “You can come with me and all of your pain will melt away.” Her green eyes pierced through me. “But you will forget everything you have ever known. You will have forgotten what it feels like to love and be loved. Everybody you have ever known will be washed away from your memory.”

I shook my head. “I don’t want that.” She smiled and tilted her head to the side.

“Nobody ever does,” she admitted. “There is a way for you to remember, but the pain of life will remain with you.” She handed me the necklace I used to wear often. The pendant was of a small star. Frank gave that to me for my birthday about six years ago. “Take this and carry it with you. You must never lose it, or you will be bound to the area where it has been lost forever. I will come back for you every two years to see if you want to go with me.” She rippled like water, and the image of the hospital room began to fade in.

Frank was crying along with my mother. I was crying, too.

I tried to call out to them. “Mom! Frank!” But they didn’t hear me. I was invisible to them.

Frank's POV

I got up early to go to the hospital, as always. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes as I ran in the big double doors, but as I approached Gerard’s room.. something was different. It was closed off, except to nurses. People scurried around frantically, yelling different terms and names that made my head fuzzy. Gerard’s heart monitor beeped out irregularly as always, but then it started to beep faster and faster. The noise grew and grew in my ears, enveloping me and blurring my vision. Louder and louder and louder, fast and faster and faster, until it wasn’t a beeping. It was one long, loud continuous beep. I felt like I’d run into a brick wall, I dropped to the ground gasping for air, choking out tears. I yelled for Gerard, but the nurses just told me everything was going to be okay. How was it going to be okay? I lost the only person I’d ever love. He was part of me. He was Gerard. And he’s gone. My breathing picked up faster and faster until I was gasping for air again. Donna sat beside me, throwing her arms tightly around me and hugging me close. Her hairspray-douses blonde curls stuck to the tears on my face as I buried my face in her chest.

“H-h-he’s g-gone” I sobbed out, “I-isn’t he..?”

She didn’t reply; she didn’t need to. We both knew he was gone. Memories flooded over me. Memories of cuddling and hugging, and late night whisperings of “You’re beautiful.. I love you.” when we thought the other was asleep; then finally the moment I woke up with his lips against mine. The tears flowed even more rapidly, sobs pouring from my throat; vomit threatening to come up after. I’d never feel his lips on mine again. He’s gone. He’d never know how I felt about him. We’d never cuddle again. I could never kiss him.  He was dead. He was gone. Like a ghost in the snow.