I'm at that stage of my life where I am lost
I don't know what makes me who I am
I don't know my defining qualities anymore!
I used to feel gifted once , and now NOTHING.
I'm stuck , I don't know which direction to head to from here.
I don't know which road to tread.
Sometimes I wonder whether being the 'nobody' , the 'insignificant' , the 'broke' is easier than trying to make my place in this world.
But I know These are just things I say to make myself feel better.
Because I can't settle for nothing .
I used to dream- believe- achieve!
But now I don't even know what to dream about.
Am I doing life right?
That is the big question.
But for right now I just need to know what to work for.
I am aware that I have
Stopped working.
Stopped achieving.
Stopped putting in even a quarter of what is required.
All because I don't know where to put it all.
Where to give my priority, where to focus on.
It's like I am in a room full of a big connected picture ,but I don't know where to start seeing it from. So I take it all in without actually taking anything in.
I am just seeing everything ,
not understanding ,
not comprehending.
I don't know who to ask for help, whose opinions to take.
I don't know whom to talk it all out to.
Because nobody listens to you rant again and again about the same problem in your life.
A problem whose solution even you don't know.
Sometimes I get confused what the problem even was.
Million words scream in my head,yet all that comes out is "I don't know "
My very own thoughts rebel against me,
They suffocate me.
They grapple me, rendering me helpless.
They burn my soul, my sense of purpose.
I am confused.
and
I don't know what to do about that.
YOU ARE READING
DEAD FEELINGS
PoesíaPenning down the extravaganza of thoughts that waltz in my head each day. Some dead, some alive, some barely breathing, but each one of them complete in it's isolation Some glooming, some blooming, some reflective and true, Some shrouded in shadow...
