Rant book

7; break down

It hit me this morning as i was crying over a fan fiction that it has been ome year since he faked his death. One year since the last skype call.
It hurt i started to cry harder.
It was maybe 2 or 3 am when we called we dissed him. You told me he was dead
Dead, about to be six feet under ground
I replied saying no he wasnt dead i swore on my life he was still alive i had a feeling. On December 23 you had told me he went missing and i said keep fucking looking.
You told me one night he was high and he told you that he wanted to get me to the state of depression he was in.
He never made me depressed he made me worse than depressed.
We talked about how it was always midnight somewhere and you told em the meaning behind it. We laughed.
Now sitting here writing about this i feel pathetic but i mean i kinda am.
Its been a year and i still havent moved on.
I mean its fine i guess.
At this point i cant wait for new years.
New year
New me
New memories
Without him
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December 27th 2017