Dear Diary...

Jonghyun's Funeral

< Yeri POV >

Ever since we found out what happened last night, it's been so quiet in SM. Most of our schedules have been postponed or canceled for a week. Today and tomorrow are the only times the rest of his fans and colleges will be able to say good bye. I'm going both days, but the rest of Red Velvet is going today. I can understand why, it's hard to see his picture surrounded by thousands of flowers in a funeral hall, but, it's the only time I get to see him again. I smile weakly, walking over to my closet. I pull down a box from the top shelf. I open it to reveal a necklace with "Angel" written on it. I tear up knowing that Jonghyun gave that to me, and now he's one. I look up to the ceiling, putting the necklace against my chest, letting a tear roll down.

"Yeri?"

"Coming!" I quickly wipe the tear and put the necklace in my pocket, throwing the box back into the closet and closing the door. I walk out to the living room, wearing mostly black, just like the other four.

"Make sure to bundle up, it's cold today." I nod, putting on that big, fluffy coat. "We ready?"

Everyone nods as Irene opens the door. We go out the door, having her follow behind us.

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"Be careful girls, there is photography everywhere."

"Are there any inside?" I suddenly blurt out.

"I don't believe so." 

Okay, good. I don't want people to see me cry. I nod as we unload from the van. Slowly getting off the van, we try to hide our faces from the cameras flashing everywhere. Why do you have to be everywhere? I sigh quietly as the staff try to hide us while leading us up to the hall.

"Now remember, don't worry about anyone. You grieve how you need to. We know it's hard." Our manager pats Seulgi and I's back, making us tear up right away. I can't believe a death is the way to have you start acting nicer to us.. There are bundles of flowers everywhere. I'm guessing from different agencies.

I don't worry about the flowers. Once I see his picture there, I tear up once more, speed walking over there to see him. I'm coming oppa! I don't look at anything besides his picture until I feel a hand grab mine. I look to see who the owner of the hand is. Minho.. your eyes are so red.. I tear up just looking at him. I know he's going through a greater pain than I am. With my instinct reaction, I hug him tightly, comforting the both of us.

Minho wraps his arms back around me, giving the hug back and quietly whispering, "I know it's painful, but let other people have a chance to say goodbye." I look at the room, it's filled with people. With all his friends and family from SM to his fans all across the world.. I understand everyone needs to grieve. I nod and sit there, holding his hand tightly until it was clear enough for me to go up there. I feel his hand let go, I look up at him as he nudges towards his picture.

I take a deep breath and walk up to his picture. I won't say anything out loud.. I gently touch the frame, holding his picture inside. I tear up once more. I had no idea you were suffering.. why didn't you tell anyone? I hang my head down, not being able to hold my tears in anymore. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, letting tears fall down my face and onto the carpet. I try not to make any sound for the others grieving. I can't believe I didn't see it, I'm sorry for not being there f-..

< Jungkook POV >

He is a legend, how could we not visit him? He has done so much to inspire us on our career. His talent will never be forgotten.

We walk up to the crowd of people already in the room. People move out of the way so we are able to go up to the front to say a few words. Also in the front, next to his picture, Yeri.  Poor thing, she can't stop crying.. I say a few words to myself in a hushed tone. I lift my head and sigh, the reality of this doesn't even seem real.