X Reader Parodies

Bully!Len Kagamine x Reader

a/n: this is a parody of those stupid bully x readers and len is our example here so have fun

contains foul language

to add to the mood of the story listen to this while reading: bit.ly/bullylen

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(Y/N) slowly made her way down the halls of Sukadik High, the sound of her shoes against the linoleum floor echoing throughout the quiet corridor. She brushed a strand of (H/C) behind her ear, adjusting her grip on her science textbook. She scanned the hall, searching for her locker, but her gaze instead landed on a certain group of hellhounds. (Y/N) internally groaned. Len Kagamine and his band of trolls.

She let out a sigh, mentally preparing herself for the all-out war that would soon commence. She quietly made her way over to the locker, avoiding eye contact with the horrid blobmonster that stood less than 3 feet away from her. His grubby little hands were pressed against his hips in an attempt to make some sassy pose. His inbred followers, Kaito and Fukase, stood at each side of him.

~ switch to (Y/N)'s pov cause 3rd person is hard fahk ~

"What's shaking?" Len sneered, pressing one of his filthy hands against my locker.

"Nasty fuck, I'm calling the cops," I gagged, my expression scrunching into one of detestation.

"Watch your mouth, bitch," the heinous blonde boy barked, moving the aforementioned hand to shove me to the tile floor. His henchman cackled in response, pointing their dirty sausage fingers at me mockingly.

I sighed, rising from my spot on the ground. I took a moment to brush off the skirt of my uniform, my gaze shifting to look at the goblins that stood before me.

"You're standing in front of my locker," I announced, crossing my arms over my chest. "Do you think you could move your fat asses over?"

"You can't tell us what to do," Fukase scoffed.

"How about you just go pop some cyanide pills in the girl's bathroom instead?" Len added, a smirk spreading across his hellish face.

"How about you all move the hell out of my way before I make trophies out of your asses?" I snapped back, my knuckles beginning to turn white as the grip on my textbook tightened.

Len's grin quickly fell, and before I knew it he had outstretched his unwashed hand and struck me-- hard-- across the face. I stumbled backwards, trying to process what had just happened.

"I think that's well-deserved," Kaito simpered, placing his hand on Len's shoulder. The latter quickly slapped the hand away, though, muttering a quick, "don't touch me, nasty ass."

I threw my textbook to the ground, drawing my fist back and slamming it into the throat of Len Kagamine, sending him flying into my poor locker. His strangled, girly scream cut through the air like a knife.

"Good God bro, it was just a prank!" Fukase shrilled, making it a run for it down the hall, Kaito following suit. I quickly turned, tackling Kaito middair and ramming him into the linoleum. I considered running after his redheaded accomplice, but the groan of Len reminded me I had bigger problems to deal with.

I rose from my spot, stomping back over to my locker. I grabbed Len by the collar of his shirt and yanked him closer. 

"Please don't kill me!" He begged, tears beginning to stream down his cheeks.

"Oh, whatever, you big baby," I scoffed, loosening my grip on his shirt and pushing him against the locker. "I suppose I need to get you some Gerber's formula?"

"Shut it!" He cried, stomping his foot against the tile. "I'm sorry for being so mean to you, okay? I actually have, like, a huge crush on you!"

I stared at him blankly for a moment before I stooped down to grab my science textbook from the ground. I slammed it into his skull, causing him to emit a wimpy cry.

"Save it, pissbaby," I remarked, shoving him away from my locker. I quickly entered the combination and placed the book inside, replacing it with my math notebook. I slammed the door and locked it back up, flipping Len the bird before I made my way to my next class.