Would I rather live without heating or air-conditioning? That's actually an easy one - thanks for the softie, Mo. There isn't a topic in the world I'd rather rattle on about in this moment. It has to be air-conditioning. Wreck every unit whose synthetic breeze ever prickles my skin, please and thank you. As the title says, bring the heat.
From winter vents, extrude pure joy. One of the final paragons of wholesome fun in this depraved world. To me, the belly-grumble and punge of burning skin-flakes which signify the furnace kicking on, is the twinkling of a driveby ice cream truck. As long as it's not something productive - and let's be honest - I will stop, drop what I'm doing, and roll to the nearest vent. Crouching there on the cold hard floor as warm air beats down on me, it's the closest thing to a hug I've ever felt.
Sometimes I think it's starting to become a bit of a problem. Here's a scene that that happens quite a lot in my life:
Parent: "Croco, come and eat at the table with the family."
Me: *is crouching in a nice warm corner* *snarls and shovels another spoonful of spaghetti in my mouth*
Parent: "crOCODILEROCKERGETINHERERIGHTNOW!"
So yeah. My family has great banter. Always joking around. They love me though... yeah. Anyway, I also have big ideas in this field, like not getting AC at all please, it only brings suffering and pain. Like, okay, I will concede that if it's over 110 degrees for like three days straight, then yeah it would be nice, but how often does that happen? Get rid of the machine, the bills all of it, all that money can even be used to pumping in more heat, if I can be ambitious and theoretical for a bit here. That would be something, wouldn't it? It's three times the heat without changing a thing. Some of you might be like 'nu uh croc, heating and cooling put out different things into the environment' and sure, but I'm talking about the other kinda green. The one that actually matters. The environment? Come on now. One of you in particular might say that well if you are cold you can get a blanket but if you're hot there's not such a convenient fix, and I'll begrudgingly admit that's a good point, but it doesn't change the fact that heat is godly and the cold is not.
In conclusion, I dream of a life without air-conditioning. Also I want to say that I got this done super early to post, but Wattpad is being wat-pad in this moment, and I suspect Mags' grandma is behind it.
