cliché twd fanfiction » why they suck

the one with the best chapter yet

okay so

i found a chapter of my works that i am rewriting. it was really old and
i'm literally crying i just found it and tears are falling from my eyes.

up to you but my read one of my current works and then read this please

Ok so our plan was working pretty well. "Sam shut the music off!" His mom yelled. Rick and Carl took a walker inside and started cutting it open. Carl and Rick picked up its insides and we each got blood splattered, and a nasty piece of it.

Rick held my hand, I held Jessie's hand, and then Jessie held Jessie's hand. ( there are two Jessie's now I guess ?) Jessie held Sams hand who held Carl's hand and so on.

We walked down the path which was filled with walkers. In fact walkers were everywhere. I looked back and saw Sams face: as if all hope just left him.
  I tried to tell Carl but he looked at me as if I was insane.
  Jessie (the one who recruited me) stopped. But it wasn't just her. Sam had let go of Carl and Jessie's  (the one that kissed Rick) hand. He whispered something soft. "Mommy, I can't." He cried, and six walkers tackled him eating him alive. I stood there in shock as both Jessie's cried. Rick grabbed Jessie's hand and waited for the other Jessie to grab his hand. But the walkers tackled Jessie to the floor eating her too. I looked at Rick and saw the sadness in his eyes and I felt cold.
Carl's hand was stuck, so Rick went over to Carl and chopped Sams hand off which was holding Carl's. And then I heard a gun cock.
  I turned around. It was all happening too fast. Michonne stabbed Ron, and he fell to the floor with a thump. Carl turned around and it was nasty. One of his eyes were missing. I started crying.
"Dad?" He asked, and fell.
"No." I whispered really softly. Rick and I carried Carl to the infirmary while Michonne bashed the heads of several walkers.

My brain was going insane as I helped everyone kill the walkers. Everything was happening too fast and then I remembered how I saw green balloons before this happened.

And then something caught my eye. It was Maggie on some giant platform and walkers trying to get at her. I left my group and limped through the crowds of walkers still in my whole walker act.

  By the time I reached Maggie, Enid and Glenn were there.

When Glenn, Abraham, and several others got Maggie off and we were all outside of the gate that wasn't blown to pieces, I hugged Maggie. I took a deep breathe and told myself it would all be fine. Carl would be ok. The walls would be better. Everyone would be safe and Maggie would have a baby.
And thank god I was right.

But I cried right then not knowing what to think.
All I could think is this all happened so fast.

BIH IM CRYING

I
I
I

so that's everything you should not do in a fan fiction :)

FML

' THERE ARE TWO JESSIES NOW I GUESS '

BIH

BITCH

reminder to my lovely people :

DO NOT GIVE THE MAIN CHARACTER A NAME THAT SOMEBODY ELSE HAS IN THE TV SHOW.

tyvm

-  xx sARA

WAIT NO NTO DONE YET

WHY DOES MY OC KNOW THAT RICK AND JESSIE MADE OUT

BIH IM WHEEZING

LIKE WAS SHE LIKE STALKING THEM WITH HER 79 INCH TELESCOPE TO HER AND CARL'S ROOM YES THEY SHARE A ROOM

and wait it gets BEYTER FUCKING BETTER

'i didn't know it yet but things will get better !!'m

BOTCH U AINT NO STORY TELLER

xx sara