Torn (h.s.)

twenty four

I haven't talked since that day she pressed her lips to mine. I kept my distance from her and Edward. I didn't sit next to her in our classes and not once did she come to us at lunch or study hall.

It's been weeks. No, months. I miss her so much, but I couldn't do anything. The couple thing is stuck. They are in love, forever and always in love.

It's March now that I think about it. The snow starts to melt. In February, my birthday sucked. I spent lunch out with Gemma, Robin and my mum. Then they went with Edward, who invited Lillian, to dinner. I sat at home and watched the wet raindrops race down the window.

Just a couple weeks ago, February 27th to be exact. My mum noticed I was really down or "not being myself". She took me to a doctor who diagnosed me as Depressed and gave me antidepressants. I didn't think I was depressed. I mean I hadn't cut my wrists and thighs leaving painful scars like most teens. I just sat inside all day. I didn't smile much, but that's normal, right? I didn't hang out with anyone, but the whole group was really just quiet nowadays. And I had only thought about ending my life maybe twice. I am depressed. Maybe I should take the pills the doctor gave. I took them every once in a while, but I never really thought I needed the, until now.

I remember that painfully awkward day I did run into her. Well I didn't really run into her. I had woken up in the middle of the night, it was quite normal now. I walked down the stairs and walked over to the couch and almost sat on her feet. She was lying there, in his arms. They slept, tangled limbs. I ran up back to my room at just sat there and cried. I hoped this was just some twisted dream. It wasn't. That was the day I stopped talking really. It was just nods and shaking of the head. It wasn't like I had a best friend to talk to anyways.

As the year rears to a close, I worry more and more. Soon Gemma will graduate and I'll be totally alone in this house. Stuck with the jerk. She's going away to University, unsure of what to study. She promises to talk to me everyday. but promises are made to be broken. And this promise is going to be broken. I'll miss her.

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I walk into my room straight after school, dropping my bookbag at my door. I sit down on my neatly made bed. Lately I've been cleaning a lot. I've cleaned almost everything at least four times. Well except my desk. It was the twin to the one in Edward's room. I stand up and grab the handle to the first drawer. It doesn't budge. I jiggle it a little and it pops open and many envelopes I have never seen before fall to the floor. I pick one and read the swirled hand writing.

Lillian

To:Harry

Feb., 8th

I look around to see the other letters the same way only different. I find the first one and tear open the closing.

Dear Harry,

I know we aren't speaking right now. Even though its only been a week, it feels like year. Long painful years. I need to talk to you, and this seemed the best way. A letter. Look, the kiss. It wasn't bad or anything. The problem was it was perfect. I had butterflies the whole walk home, because I finally got to kiss you. I just can't stop thinking of you, where ever I am. I feel love when I see your face. I don't know what to say. I guess I'm truly, madly, and deeply in love with you Harry.

Every Monday, I will wait for you. I don't think you will ever find this letter, but I will continue to wait.

Love, Lillian Peters xo

I rip open the next Letter in the large stack, eyes wide.

Harry.

Look I know I said I love you, but I got really scared you would be confused. Edward isn't trapping me in this relationship. See I love you both so much. I guess you could say I'm torn in two? I hope to see you Monday.

Love, Lillian Peters xo

I rush through the letters, there are at least a hundred. Her feeling pouring out. Every Monday waiting for me while I sat here being alone. Now I knew I had a chance, in several letters, she mentions she's having complications in her relationship with my brother. Each letter ends with Love.

As I finish reading the letters, I hear her laugh. I jump up and run into her and Edward as they make their way to his room., a grin on my face. " Can I talk to you?" those were the first words I've spoken in months.

"Edward, go ahead. I'll be there soon." She says giving him a look and he enters his room. I pull her into my room, letting her see the opened letters. She smiles.

I look into her beautiful hazel eyes. My breath on her lips. I lean closer and let out lips collide. I squeeze my eyes shut and open them and the sparks go flying.

"Well Lillian, I guess you could say I'm truly madly, and deeply in love with you."

Hello! I think this chapter turned out alright. Sorry about the cheesy reference to the songs! I'm really sad about that Zouis thing. I mean if that's what they really do, then we've been lied to. We don't really know these one direction lads for who they really are, and that's what makes me really sad.

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