suicide || h.s ✔

twenty eight - past

{Edited- anyone else missing Haylee?}

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We arrived at the Dublin Airport around 8:00 in the morning. I was beyond excited about our concert tonight. I couldn't get any sleep on the plane since my excitement kept me awake. I love performing and it feels good getting back on the road and doing the things I love, especially putting smiles on my fans faces. I love the rush, the screaming fans, the loudness, just everything about performing. Performing is what keeps me sane and makes me feel like I belong somewhere in this world for people.

"Are you ready, Harry? We are heading to the stadium now. Let's get into the tour bus."

I grabbed my carry on bags and followed Paul to the door of our tour bus. It feels like forever since I have been on this bus. Paul opened the door for me and I noticed that I was the first person to be on it. I looked around, noticing that everything looked the same. I walked to the back of the bus where are bunks are and plopped my stuff down on my bed. Inside, some pictures and things my fans gave me were still hanging on the wall. My suitcases were already on the bus since I sent them to Ireland a few days ago.

"Hey!" I heard Niall say from behind me. We were performing at Croke Park tonight and Niall was extremely excited to perform in his home town. He loved performing in his hometown, seeing familiar faces and being with his family and friends.

"Hey," I said back to Niall. I helped Niall carry in his bags and to his bunk bed across from mine. On the tour bus, Zayn was below me, I was in the middle and Louis was above me. On the other side, Liam was on the bottom and Niall was on top. The last bunk bed remained empty and we usually just stored more stuff in there unless we had a guest on the bus that was staying over night (which rarely happened).

"What time is the concert tonight?" I asked Niall.

"Seven but we will be heading over there in about an hour." Looking up at the clock, I realized that it was only nine in the morning.

"Well, what should we do while wait?"

Before Niall could respond, Louis came running in, dropped his bags on the floor and screamed, "Video games!"

***

"You boys are on in thirty minutes. Here are your ear pieces. Louis, don't lose yours again and don't give me that look, remember what happened last time? Niall, your parents are in the dressing room with Kaylee. You head over there now while I get these idiots their earpieces on." We listened to Madison as she helped us with our ear pieces. Usually when we have the earpieces in, we don't take them back out and leave them in the bathroom on the other side of the stadium and have to make everyone late to perform. (By the way, Louis did that)

"Alright, you lads are all set up. Go on and head over with Niall." We nodded at Madison and walked over to our large dressing room. Inside, I could hear laughter. We opened the door and walked inside.

"Zayn! Liam! Harry! Louis! How have you lads been?" Niall's mum walked over to us and engulfed us into a huge hug. She was a hugger.

"I'm well," I said and the rest responded back in similar responses.

Over to my right was Kaylee. Zayn looked over at her and said, "Hey, Kaylee."

"Hello," She replied. She had on the VIP lanyard around her neck. She was wearing shorts with a tank top and her hair was in a high ponytail. There were bracelets and tattoos covering her arms. When I looked away, I did a double take, since when did she have tattoos?

"Hey Kaylee," I said. The whole room got quiet as everyone stared at us. I wasn't going to ignore her. I was going to be at least civil with her, it was the least I could do, right?

"Hey," she said, that angelic voice getting me all worked up. God she's beautiful. No, stop it, Harry. You can't fall for her again. She'll only break your heart again.

"When did you get the tattoos?" I asked her, curiosity taking over me. The atmosphere in the room was tense and my words came out like I practice them, which I didn't do.

"Oh, I got these a few weeks ago. I was tired of looking at those ugly scars so I covered them up with tattoos. Do you want to see?" I nodded my head and she continued talking, pointing at each tattoos on her arms," This one is an infinity sign with a anchor going through it. I got this to remind me to stay afloat and not sink to the bottom of the ocean again. This one is a heart with my mom and dad's name in it for a memory of them. This one over here is a rose. I just like roses. The one that says 'stay strong' is to remind me to stay strong, obviously.. And the last one here is just a phrase that I enjoy 'stronger than yesterday'."

I gaped at her, loving how each of her tattoos resembled a meaning for her life. I love how they aren't pointless, meaningless tattoos just to cover up some scars. Most of mine are meaningless tattoos. I just get them because my body is my journal and it says the words I can't say.

"Well, I love them. They're beautiful." And so are you

"Thank you, Harry. So, how have you been?' I know the lads were pretending not to listen to our conversation, but I knew that they were. They were pretending to talk in a huddle behind Kaylee but I saw them stealing glances at us.

"I have been better," I respond, being honest. Honesty is the best policy.

"Niall told me you weren't doing so well. What happened?"

I sighed, "It's not very important"

She frowned, "Well it had to be if you ended up in the hospital." She trailed off as Niall gave her a look. Thanks, Niall

Soon a knock sounded at the door, disrupting this awkward conversation. Liam looked towards the door. "Come in."

The door opened and in came a guy around our age. He smiled at all of us, saying hello and shaking hands. "Hi, I'm Oliver. You must be Harry." I nodded, shaking his stretched out hand. I looked at the boys, seeing they had confused faces too, besides Niall's parents. Niall's mum had a pained expression on her face.

"Not trying to sound rude or anything, but who are you?" Louis asked but there was a small sense of rudeness to his words.

Oliver chuckled, before wrapping an arm around Kaylee's waist. "I'm Kaylee's boyfriend."

Excuse me, what?

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DUN DUN DUN