Mikaal

21: Mikaal

"Meagan!!" Dalia added four of the same yellow-faced emoji's into the Messenger chat, to express her feeling of uncertainty. She shuffled on top of her double bed, turning to her right, her head comfortably resting on her latex pillow as she cradled her phone in her hands.

"What's up D?? Boy problems?"

Dalia couldn't help but smile. What other problems existed except that they related to boys? But in spite of needing her friend, she hesitated.

She had been in indecision for a couple of days since her boxing catch-up with Mikaal - needing a sounding board, an attentive ear and advice from a dear and close friend, yet feeling torn about how much she should reveal. Because she could already guess what Meagan would say about Mikaal now that it was 'confirmed' - straight from the horse's mouth - that he had once enjoyed playing around with multiple girls for the challenge, almost like it was a sport. Yet, why did she not feel repulsed by this knowledge, and why did she just not want to hear what Meagan would likely say?

Dalia scrunched her nose, reminding herself that wasn't it funny how we sometimes seek out friends for 'advice', yet we purposely pick the friend who we already know will say what we want to hear - or we purposely hide critical information that could lead to getting advice that may be a hard pill to swallow... If Dalia was honest with herself, she knew that there was no point in asking for guidance after manipulation of the facts or of the situation.

Dalia pushed through the resistance to be upfront and began giving Meagan an honest account of what she had learnt the other day over the satiating charcoal chicken meal.

"Now before you say 'I told you so'," Dalia added, but then, in a tone that she hoped came across as imploring in spite of speaking in text, continued, "Actually just don't say I told you so. That's not why I talk to you. I really need your help with this. It's so hard when you're in it..."

Meagan didn't respond straight away - there wasn't even the indication that she was typing something that the Facebook Messenger app would display just above the icons showing the additional things you could add to your chat messages, such as photos and animated GIFs.

"Totally understand what you're going through D. The hardest situation is like when you can't help your feelings for someone who's not good for you."

'Not good for you...' Dalia didn't know why, but she felt a stab at seeing the words plainly in front of her. As if a reflection of her shift in mood, the light pitter patter of raindrops outside turned into pounding, heavy rain launching an attack on their tile roof. Dalia inhaled deeply, focussing on her expanding lungs beneath her rising chest to distract herself from an unexplainable pain, before looking back at her iPhone screen, seeing that Meagan was in the middle of typing something more.

"That's just the thing, they've had like so much experience with girls, so they do the right things to tug at our heartstrings."

"But he didn't have to be upfront and honest, but he was, even though he would've surely known it would put me off," Dalia said, not able to help herself, her thumbs having a mind of their own, typing the counterargument within seconds thanks to the assistance of 'autocorrect' and 'predictive text'.

"That could be like a new tactic though. Us girls are getting smarter you know. But even if he has stopped seeing tonnes of girls, you know he had that tendency once, so he could easily revert back to his old ways." There was another pause in Meagan's typing before she added, "D, I know it's not easy hearing any of this, but I have to tell you my honest POV, that's why you talk to me, right?"

"Off course!" Dalia said immediately, adding two heart emojis in her response. "I really do appreciate it hun..." She curled her toes and took in another deep breath, knowing what she had to admit next. "Meagan, I have to be honest though... I know it's crazy, like out of an unrealistic, fairytale, rom-com, but I just can't help a strong feeling that he is genuine... I'm not saying that I'd start a relationship with him, I'd only stay a friend. But I feel like I have to listen to my gut and its been saying from the start that there's just something about him... I don't know how to describe it, but I just feel I need to get to know him more before I write him off completely."