Loving My Ex Lover

Chapter 8: Reality

Happiness, that's what I have seen at my friends' faces when they got the chance to hold Baby River with their hands. Ewan ko, pero bigla akong nakaramdam ng konting inggit. Siguro kasi, lately madalas lang akong nag-iisa. Well, it's my choice. I wanted to spend some time, think of what I want to happen in my life.

Right now, it's just another morning. Woke up with nothing but hope of the day to be done, so that night will take me back to my bed and just sleep. Ito na yata ang reyalidad, it has began to strike me. When I saw Margo at the Hospital, wow. She is just as fascinating as she always has been, beautiful and I can't help but envy his boyfriend.

I took shower, prepare for work. Wala ako sa mood magbreakfast so I only plan to bid Mom and Dad goodbye before heading out.

" Not eating?"

Tanong ng Mommy ng humalik ako rito.

" Sa office na lang Ma."

Tumango ito.

" Bye Dad."

Tumango ito, palabas na ako when he call my name.

" Meet me at 9 tonight, don't be late. I'll phone Ramsey the address later."

Napalingon ako, ngumiti ang Mommy. Tumango ako.

" Okay Dad."

" Don't be late, and have your dinner."

" I won't."

The first time for so long that Dad smile at me, kahit sa office na nagkaksalubong or nasa iisang meeting he don't bother looking at me. Kaya nakangiti akong lumabas ng bahay, sumakay sa kotse ko at nagtungo sa opisina.

I don't know what he was planning, until my secretary hand me the piece of paper with the address on it. It's one of his favorite bar, kaya pala pinapakain ako ng hapunan. Napangiti ako.

Paglabas sa opisina, alam ng Daddy na may Seven o'clock meeting ako. Kaya dumaan lang ako ng burger house, ate my favorite burger meal at diretso sa bar na nakasulat sa papel. I was looking for him, pero imbisbna ang Daddy. It was Margo's dad whom I found sitting in front of the counter, wavinf at me. Lumapit ako rito, bumati.

" Have a seat."

Tumango ako.

" I hope you don't mind me using your Dad to get in touch with you?"

" Not at all Mr. Wilson."

" Mr. Wilson? Come on, you used to call me Uncle Ben. So, just call me that way."

Tumango ako, nag-abot ang barista ng baso ng alak rito at inabot sa akin.

" I hope I still know what you like?"

Natawa ako, saka ngumiti.

" Alam mo, I wanted to thank you."

" For what po?"

" For what have you been doing for my Mom, do you know that she is well? Makakalimutin lang, but she is stubborn and would insist to stay in the Hospital. So we asked her why? Sabi niya, Lindon had been visitng me there. Parang hindi na niya alam dito pumunta sa bahay, doon siya sa Ospital nagpupunta eh."

Natawa ako, matapos ko siyang madalaw paglipas ng kasal ni Tiffany. Nadalaw ko siya ng minsanan, at matapos ko siyang madalaw noong pagkapanganak ni Valie kay River. Dinalasan ko na, pero I made sure na hindi kami magkakasalubong ni Margo.

" So, wala kaming magawa. You knew her, she would throw tantrum kapag hindi napagbigyan. Kaya sabi ng doktor, hayaan na lang din at bumabalik ang sigla ng Mommy ko. It's funny, how you have been treating  her. And it's funny that, with you dancing with her, listening to her stories made her feel better. So, I owe you Lindon. Big time."

" Don't mention it po Uncle Ben, actually. Namimiss ko lang din si Lola, kaya nong magkaroon ng oras. Dinalasan ko na din, at nakakatuwa ring mapakinggan ang mga kwento niya."

" Kahit paulit-ulit?"

" Kahit paulit-ulit."

Inangat niya ang baso at nakipag toast, tinugon ko iyon at sabay naming tinungga ang laman ng baso. Umorder ulit, and isa..dalawa..tatlo..dumami pa. He still has it., malakas pa ding uminom.

" How have you been? I heard a lot from Julio, I mean you know. You skipping the party time, prefer to stay at home. Why?"

" I don't know, I just woke up one day longing for a peaceful surrounding. It's home that has given me peace."

" You know, I do not dislike you. Actually, I was so happy that you and Margo dated. Kasi I have known your Dad for so long, and he is a great guy, a good man surely raises his son well. Kaya sabi ko, Margo is one lucky woman. Unfortunately, I saw you in a hotel. In the lobby, right in my face you were drunk and well...making out with some woman."

He took a sip from his glass, napayuko ako. Nakakahiya pala, sobra.

" Do you know what I have in mind that time Lindon? Gusto kitang suntukin, gusto kitang hilain palabas ng hotel amd make you explain..pero sabi ko. What will you be saying? Na lasing ka lang? Kaya sabi ko, non sense. Sabi ko, what if I get a gun and shoot you in the head? I am a father of the woman na niloloko mo, and my heart wss broken watching you that night. Naiyak ako, kasi alam ko mahal ka mg anak ko eh. At kahit alam kong may kakaiba sa relasyon ninyo, lalo pa na nahuhuli ko silang seryuso ng bestfriend niya na pinag-uusapan ka. Wala naman akong magagawa, ayokong maging atribida sa inyo. After a week, she came home my princess csme home with her heart broken. Niyakap ko siya mahigpit, all she was saying was " Dad, I've let him go. It's for the best for both of us". Ang sakit, iyong may alam ako but I was pretending not to know para hindi siya makaramdam ng mas mabigat pa."

I saw Uncle Ben wipe off his tears, and I just let mine falls. Ramdam ko ang sakit, and this is what reality looks like. Iyong isasampal sayo kung gaano kang nagkamali, iyong ipapaalala sayo kung paano mong binalewala ang lahat.

He oat my shoulder.

" I am not saying this to make you feel bad Lindon, I am saying this to remind you..as a man. Hindi perpekto, dumaan din ako sa ganyan. But when I met her Mom, I've made my self a promise. To never ever gonna hurt the woman who stand by me kahit gaano ako ka imperfect. Now, put this in your head. As your Uncle, it's not too late to change path. That feelingnof you taking a lay low of your bachelor life. That's a sign  that you young man is not getting younger anymore, and that it is time for you to set a goal. Future, what and how would you like it to be. Different beds, hotels, bars, different faces or that one face of that one woman na mamahalin ka at mamahalin mo? Your Dad is really rigth, you are a cry baby hiding behind that mask of a cheap slut."

Natawa ako at pinagdiinan niya ang salitang slut.

" You owe your Dad, after the two of you broke up. He came to us, apologizing for what his son did to my daughter and that he is willing to accept the prize. So sabi ko, what prize? Sabi niya, anything that you want to do with my son. You are allowed to. Sabi ko, I am not a killer..I am just a businessman and you are my friend so let's just be friend and let our children grow up sa sarili nilanh pagkakamali."

" I'm sorry Uncle Ben, I trully am."

Hagulhol ko, niyakao niya ako.

" If you are sorry, fix your life, your self and you be a man."

Ilang baso pa ang naubos namin, bago kami nagpasyang lumabas na. His driver was waiting for him already, he gave me a hug and tap on my back. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam, that he had forgiven me already bago pa man kami nagkausap.

I went home, my Dad greet me sa pinto. Yumakap ako rito at inilabas ang natitirang saloobin, and he gave me his shoulders to cry on and his arms making me feel that it is okay. Reality, I am not ready to face a new day.