The Diary of Eleanor Calder

Chapter 13: March 2014

March 1, 2014

"Let's dance. I won't bite Eleanor" Diary, do you know who asked me to dance at Perrie and Zayn's beach party at their new beach house? Harold Edward Styles, that's who. I literally was at a loss for words and I had no idea what to say. I just stared at him blankly until my mouth formed a word I never expected to ever come out of my mouth. "Yes" I SAID YES!!! WHY DID I SAY YES??? Anyways, we danced to a few slow songs on the beach and then I started to get tired so I bid him goodnight and I went to bed. Perrie kept giving me looks, but there's no way I have a crush on Harry. He's not my type anyways...I think. UGH I don't even know anymore. TTYL Diary. Love, Eleanor

March 3, 2014

Summer has started for me already which I know is ridiculous since it's only March, but you can't judge me. It's really nice in Malibu and I when Perrie asked me to stay at their new beach house, I couldn't refuse! Even though I told myself I'd be boy-free this summer, I don't really know if I'll keep that promise. Louis hasn't shown his face, but I wish he would. I want to talk to him, but he's always avoiding me for some reason. Zayn told me he still needs time, but I don't know how much longer I can wait before I give up. I must go Diary. Perrie is taking me to Nektar. Love, Eleanor

March 5, 2014

I'm going to wring Harry's neck! He's such a conniving little prick! He went and snooped through my diary again and made a point to tease me about him not being my type. Ugh, why can't he just dig himself a ditch, throw himself in it and bury himself in dirt? What if I do have feelings for Harry and I'm just hiding them because I'm afraid of rejection? Oh....I must go Diary. Love, Eleanor.

March 9, 2014

I may or may not have told Harry I've been in love with him since the day we met and then we proceeded to make out....Yeah I did all of that and it was the most thrilling thing EVER! But then Harry looked me straight in the eye and told me he didn't have the same feelings. And then he proceeded to get up and walk away from me, leaving me to cry all alone on the beach. Why had I been so naïve? To be honest, I stopped having feelings for Louis a long time ago. We just had the same routine day after day and it was getting annoying. I don't really love Harry either, I just wanted someone to actually love me for once. Sadly, it backfired in my face. Forever lonely. Love, Eleanor

March 11, 2014

Me, Perrie, Zayn, Dani, Liam, Niall, and Harry all traveled up to Van Nuys to see Maddie today since she and her mum have been visiting her Nan. It was really awkward with me, Harry and Maddie in the room since I was the one to make out with him only 2 days prior. Maddie pretended like Harry wasn't there which was a good thing since I felt super uncomfortable. I know I shouldn't have felt that way, but I did and I felt like shit. Your probably wondering why I didn't tell Maddie, but there was no reason to. She hates him as much as I do. I sadly have to go. Madde and her mum invited me to dinner..woo. Love, Eleanor

March 13, 2014

I have no motivation to write in you anymore. I really don't know why. I always look forward to writing in you since it gives me a sense of calm when I write down all my trouble and thoughts. This whole Harry situation has me twisted up inside and I don't really know what to do. The fact that he lead me on hurts me the most. He'll never change. Hell, he might even be a player when he's a senile old man. Anyways, should I tell Louis? He may be able to help me since he knows Harry better than I do. I'll save this thrilling saga for another day. I must go. Love, Eleanor.

March 15, 2014

I'm numb diary. Completely and utterly numb. These past two days have been gut wrenching, but I've gotten through it. Don't ask me how, but I have. I called Louis up and told him what happened. He seemed calm as I was talking to him, but whatever he said to Harry must've been un-calm since Harry looked at me as if he was afraid to touch me. I don't know what caused me to pick up the phone and ring Louis, but I knew it was the right thing to do in the end. Perrie is high on life today and I don't exactly know why. Must be the orange blossoms blooming around Malibu. I thinking about moving here permanently. England is so dreary and it has so many memories that I'd like to forget. I have to end this entry here. Love, Eleanor.

March 17, 2014

I've decided to do my entries every 2 days so I'm not all over the place. Maddie and I hung out today and it was nice. We went to both Brandy Melville stores in L.A since the first store didn't have the dress Maddie wanted. I got a few cardigans and the Kember Dress which I'm obsessed with. Maddie and I also went to the grove and shopped there for awhile until we saw Harry. We ducked into Victorias Secret and waited for him to pass by, then we made a beeline for my rental car. I dropped Maddie off and drove back to the beach house and I ate some dinner with Perrie. We had to call the cops on some kids since they were being rowdy on the beach. I understand it's spring break, but for the love of god, shut up. Goodnight diary. Love, Eleanor.

March 19, 2014

What do I have to say today? Nothing really. My day has been very slow and boring due to the fact Maddie has gone back to Arizona and Perrie is with Zayn. I've sat in bed all day and watched reruns of Boy Meets World. That show should've never ended in my opinion. I'll be leaving on the 21st to go to Oregon with Perrie for some Little Mix event so I won't be writing in you until the beginning of April. I don't want to record anything from my Oregon trip, because it'll most likely be very boring and I won't have the time to write in you anyways. I must bid you goodnight. Love, Eleanor.

March 21, 2014

I have a bit of time to write in you before I leave for the airport. Everyone is bustling around the house to make sure everything is in order before Perrie and I leave. I told Harry to take good care of the house while we're gone and to watch Zayn (he might graffiti the house). I'm writing this outside since this is the only place in the house that's quiet. I'll see you in April. Love, Eleanor.

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A/N: Sorry this update took so long. I hope you all like this chapter of Eleanor's diary. I put a lot of time and effort into it. Chapter 10 will be up the 3rd week of April. Love you all! - Maggie xx

Songs I listened to while writing:

Take Back The Night: Justin Timberlake

Carryout: Timbaland feat. Justin Timberlake

Happy: Pharrell

Rain Man: Eminem