Hopeless

Chapter 5

"Are you sure (y/n)?" 

You rubbed your arms slightly

"At least let me hear him again Shockwave." 

The Decepticon seemed sympathetic for a moment before his sigular red optic hardened to an almost emotionless state again. 

"Of course. I can allow you to listen... just don't make much noise." 

You vented and sank down more into the seat before his desk. 

Shockwaves optic focused on you before looking back at the monitor before him. 

"Megatron— Shockwave reporting in from Cybertron." 

You held your vents as you both waited for a response. 

";;Ah Yes, Shockwave. What is the status?;;" 

You placed a servo over your intake stiff. 

Your spark felt as though it was dancing through your chassis. It twisted and turned reaching out in a weak attempt to grasp onto the mech you have fallen for, despite your best efforts. 

Every time the mech spoke you shuddered. the two exchanged information about what the Shockwave has discovered as a spy.

 ";;— How is... she?;;" 

Shockwave looked up at you for a breif moment.

"She is Fine my lordship. Accepted your gift of a habsuite." 

";; Exellent, I want her on a ship to this disgusting organic planet as soon as possible. Maybe she can make this place more tolerable.;;" 

"Of course my liege.." Shockwave trailed off

";;you seem distracted today shockwave, why?;;" 

He looked back at you and you stared back with wide optics. His gaze quickly darted back to the monitor.

"Nothing you need to concern yourself my liege." He replied 

":;usually you don't seem so absent, what is it?;:" 

"Erm.. I suppose it would be better you show you.."

You quickly began to shake your helm in a secret plea for him not to do I think.

":;alright shockwave.;:" 

Shockwave looked at you with a little sympathy and turned the monitor towards you. You jerked sharply both servos over your intake as you looked at the static filled screen. 

You blinked when it flickered off and tilted your helm confused. 

"It... it turned off?" 

Shockwave seemed confused and turned it back to himself. 

"What?..." he tapped the console board 

You took this chance to leave struggling to keep the tears down. 

~ 

You laughed drunkily as Longarm tried to get a straight answer from you.

"Shocky~" You crooned leaning heavily on the significantly shorter mech, "Shocky~ Do.. do dah thing!" 

The mech sighed and stretched in to his true form causing you to giggle loudly and contine to stumble about your habsuite your pedes heavy.

"(Y/n), when did you get yourself this intoxicated?" The large mech asked preventing you from falling off to the side 

"I.. uhh.." you hiccuped, "Prabably sometime after hearing megsy." 

He sighed, "You haven't been this stumbly since before the war..." 

you hiccuped causing your optics to glitch, you saw heat signatures and you laughed loudly arching in the mechs grasp. 

"Look shocky! I did a thang!" You laughed crossing your optics 

He sighed, "You require recharge." 

"Nuuuu!" You complained loudly, "I don't like recharge!" 

"Why?" He asked singular red optic narrowing 

"I.. I don't like recharging alone!" You squirmed trying to escape 

His grip only tightened, "Why?" 

In your drunken more emotion open state you began to cry, hard. Your chassis trembled with each hideous sob that was released from your vocalizer. You jammed your palms into your optics trying to keep the tears back. 

It was a terrible failure, of course. You arched into yourself sobs and hiccups causing you to tremble. 

Shockwave stiffened slightly awkward and gingerly pat your back unsure how to handle to usually stoic femme in his hold.

"I-I'm Just.." You whimpered, "the berth isn't too cold.." 

shockwave hummed in a knowing way and lead you to the large fluffy berth you have yet too use in your month of living here. The mech placed you onto the plush material. 

"Since I don't trust you in the current state you are in," he heaved sigh, "I will be recharging in the common room, if you so require me."

He paused as he ducked under the doorframe, "... Get well." 

You sighed and flopped back in the plush wasteful berth. You stared at the ceiling the room taking on a slow spin causing a fish-bowl affect. It started to hurt too much to keep your optics open.

So you closed them.

Allowing a darkness to consume you. 

Emotions flooded through you memories and feelings you forced down firing like a cannon through your heavy helm. 

You just wanted it to end.

Wanted it to stop.

Forever.