A Silent Lover

13. TaekWoon

The Jellyfish entertainment building loomed above me as I stood in front of it, but there were no accompanying feelings of trepidation despite the reason that I was here. It felt too much like home after almost eight years of being inside it. My life had changed because of the people inside and I couldn't be more grateful that they had chosen me out of so many others.

Despite the world of K-pop having a dark underbelly full of money hungry CEOs and companies only interested in their bottom line, Jellyfish genuinely cared about its idols. And in the case of myself, they hadn't pushed me to be someone I wasn't.
Being shy and quiet just wasn't conducive to an idol lifestyle and our livelihoods depended on doing certain things for our fans, acting in ways that I wasn't wired to act. And while I knew of other idols who had pushed their own personalities aside for the sake of fame, my company hadn't made me do the same.

In some ways I was more grateful for that than anything else they had done for me. It was with a complete understanding that I may have been about to irrevocably hinder my career, that I walked into the building and rode the elevator up to the top floor. I addressed the secretary there and asked to speak with Hwang SeiJun, the CEO of my company.

Hwang SeiJun was a kind faced man, his glasses giving him a fatherly air to his expression when he smiled. And as the laugh lines around his eyes and mouth attested, he smiled often. My heart beat picked up its pace as he greeted me with one of his smiles and I gave him a hesitant one in return. I glanced around his office in nervousness as I sat down in the large leather chair across him, my body immediately enveloped in the cushiony material.

"Jung TaekWoon, it's good to see you. Come and sit down! Congratulations on Vixx's latest win. You boys did a wonderful job; have you seen all the nominations for the Bongsang? I'm very proud of you all."

"Thank you Sajangnim, we'll continue to work hard."

I took a deep breath, letting the air escape past my lips slowly. I worked up the courage to say what I needed to, repeating the words internally one last time as I bit my bottom lip into submission.

"So, what can I do for you TaekWoon-ah. I know you didn't come here just to hear me compliment you."

His smile lingers around his mouth even though his tone has turned serious and I feel myself calming as he talks, my heart beat returning to normal.

"Honestly, it's something that's happened recently. I guess there's no real delicate way to say this, so I'll just say it... I've gotten married."

Shock was clear on my Sajangnim's face and I quickly continued talking.

"I know it was kind of a rush but I'm fully ready to take responsibility for my actions. I know that this might hurt my career but I felt that this girl was special. I didn't want to let her go."

My CEO stared at me for a long time and neither of us spoke. I fidgeted in my seat under his intense gaze, uncomfortable with his full attention on me. Finally, after some long minutes he spoke quietly.

"You know, if this had been any one of your other members telling me they'd gotten married, I may have questioned their decision." He smiled at me finally and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"But as for you TaekWoon, I've known very few people like you. Your determination is something that I saw in you from the beginning. And anyone willing to interrupt a successful sunbae on national TV to ask for a second chance to sing was bound to go after what he wants. There would've been no stopping you if love was involved."

Sajangnim gave a loud chuckle at his own joke while I felt my face get hot and I bent my head in an instinctive response, weakly protesting his embarrassing words. The MyDol progress checks held on television were still a source of embarrassment for me to this day. But he hadn't been wrong about my feelings for Imani.