Not Gonna Fall In Love With You

Chapter TwentyOne - Part II

Chapter TwentyOne - Part II

I closed my eyes, and swallowed the lump in my throat, trying to soak in what just happened. But the fact was, I couldn't. No matter how hard I try to fix things up, not only with Nate but even overall, somehow it all just blows up in my face.

I don't how to react or even what should I feel right now. Should I be mad about Mindy or should I be sad about how badly had I just hurt Nate, by something I didn't even do.

What if this the end? The end of us. The end of me and him. What if I lose him not only as a boyfriend but as a friend too?

Oh god.

But no matter what is the truth, I know one thing for sure, I owed an apology to Nate.

He deserves to know the reason why his own girlfriend would do something like this. He deserved to know why his own girlfriend would be the reason for his dreams to break. He needs to know why she would insult him in front of the whole school.

Even though I probably don't have the same feelings for him, that doesn't mean that I can't reason between what is right and wrong. I can't do this and not apologise.

I know it's not my fault, hell, I should be the one receiving an apology from Mindy. But I am bigger than that, and this is bigger than that. This is about my relationship with Nate. This about these two years of my life I spent being in love with him. Well not so much in love now, but I still have feelings for him. A bit, but I do.

We may not be the same now, but that cannot deny the fact of how amazing he has been with me. How kind he has been to me. How he was always there for me, rain or shine. This is about him. Not me. And definitely not Mindy.

I tucked my phone in the pockets of my black skinny jeans, and wiped the tear which I just realised was on my cheeks. The tear which had sprung to my eyes on the realisation that I just potentially am no longer in a relationship. I opened my eyes which had become soft with tears, and tried to search around the school for Nate despite the blurriness. After searching for him for five minutes with no luck, I decided it would be better if I called him.

Right now.

I dialled his number, and heard the phone ring for a while, like an everlasting tune. He didn't answer. I tried again but no success. He didn't pick up all of my eigth missed calls. I knew at once, he didn't want to talk. I get it though, if I were him, I too would want nothing to do with a girl like that. Nothing.

I decided that it was better to give him his space and not waste time calling him. Instead I should just text him. Yup, that would be good.

Me 9:26am

I am so sorry Nate. I know you wouldn't even want to see my face right now, or hear my voice and that's probably the reason you are not answering my calls. But I just need one more chance to explain. I promise you, it wasn't my fault. Just give me one last chance. PLEASE..

I waited for him to reply but realised that if he didn't answer any of my calls, he wouldn't reply to my text so quick too, so I went to my locker to remove my pair of scissors. If I couldn't stop the poster from being stuck, that doesn't mean that I can't cut it right?

I know what I need to do to make things straight. I think. This time only talking won't do, words won't make my case any stronger instead it will make it only worse. So, only texting him won't be enough, I need to think of something else.

To prove Nate my innocence, I need do some work. I need to rip apart all these posters, go to the principle's office and beg for him to let me withdraw. Or perhaps even aggrevate him that this poster is just too personal. Yeah, that should do.