Chapter 9: Rules Of Starting over

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I remained in the living room even after Ezzy had left. I was shock to the point that I couldn't move, i just stared into oblivion. 

Everything is going to be ok, all i have to is be a normal teenager and start over. Everything is going to be alright.  I Chanted to myself. trying to convince myself of the impossible. 

This is the only life i know. if i give up fighting, it's like giving up my right to speak and i don't know to do either one of those two so i don't know what to do. literally. 

" you ok" corey entered the room with a concerned look on his face. i sighed before pressing my lip together and forcing them to the sides. A habit i had for year, i usually do it when i was confused or just indecisive.

"well" i looked up at him " i'm no longer a fighter" i intertwined my fingers and arched my back a little when i said this. 

" you're joking right" i just shake my head.  i hate speaking when i'm upset. " why" he asked. I wanted to tell him nut i knew he would tell me to do whatever i want and not to worry about them but i can't do that . i love him too much. soo i lied 

" i was time to give it up" he paused for a minute then shake his head.

" i would have believed you if you said you got a boyfriend " he laughed a little as if imagining me with a boyfriend.

" i can get a boyfriend" i declared. well the idea is kind of crazy but hey if i'm being normal why not.

" oh really and you do know you're going to have to wear actual girl clothes right" he looked at me up and down. " not those ugly jeans and that plain shirt.....that is probably mine" i will have to admit the shirt is his but that's because i couldn't bother to unpack.

" let me tell you, i am going to get a boyfriend and i am going to get a job like normal teenagers do but the clothes no honey i will not be uncomfortable" i got up off the sofa and head up stairs to my room.

maybe i will be normal. There is no harm in that. Literally. 

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I didn't go to school the next day because i knew night would be there. All i wanted to do for a day is feel ashamed without having to look at someone who knew about it. i just wanted to breathe for a day.

I called Ezzy in the morning and he had promised to get me a job because he had links all ove the city so i was waiting on him outside my house.

" i would not hire you with that face" i looked up to a smiling Ezzy in his black BMW

" well honey this is the face i have and i you can't handle my face you won't be able to handle my attitude" i pushed myself off the wall and waled towards the passenger seat of hos car.

" fire" he grinned " i like it" i pushed my eyebrows together and smiled a little bit.

" you're in a good mood" he pulled out of my drive way and onto the road.

" yeah because i just got u a job as a cashier at  Dahlia's Cafe. so u gonna need that bright smile........that you don't have" he seem to have second thoughts about getting me a job as a cashier because he nitted his eyebrows together and he got a little serious.

" don't worry i know how to be nice" 

this is my new beginng. Maybe not perfect but i'm working with it.

**********

heyyyy, 

i enjoy writing this chapter in a way, hope you liked it.

kiss kiss

terry

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