The Switch (GirlxGirl)

Chapter 14: Ignorance

Song: Painting (Masterpiece) - Lewis Del Mar

Winter break passed right before my eyes. I didn't set foot in another party after that first Saturday and those mistakes that are still hazy in my memory. I barely saw Elizabeth after that as well, my parents claimed they wanted to spend time with me before they ship me off to university. It was difficult to get away from their constant attention and affection. As sentimental as they seemed, I still have several months until college.

I got accepted into my dream school, however, which made me literally scream. My mum came rushing in, thinking I had injured myself. She was ecstatic. Maybe because the school is so far away, but either way, she was happy for me. So was my dad once he got home from work. They took me out to celebrate at dinner that night. When I texted Kali and Avalon, they also took me out to the ice cream parlour the next day. I'm glad everyone's so supportive but there's really one person that I've been dying to tell.

I knock quietly on Elizabeth's classroom door but it's masked by the warning bell of the beginning of third hour. Elizabeth is typing on her phone in the back of the classroom so I step quietly in and allow myself to go undetected. I close the door behind myself, excited to see my girlfriend for the first time in close to two weeks. It still teases my mind to call her that. I lock the door and step towards her but sadly she saw my movements out of her peripheral vision and she looks up with a grin.

"Hey baby." She says, placing hr phone on her purse and beckoning me close to her with open arms. As I get closer, her arms envelop my body in a warm embrace.

"I missed you." I whisper on her shoulder, trying to contain the excitement whirring around my thoughts at everything to tell her. She takes me by my upper arms and looks at me with longing admiration. "I have news." I just can't wait to tell her!

"Well tell me!" She says excitedly, not even knowing what I'm going to tell her yet. We sit down at a cluster of desks and she holds my hands over our legs. I look into her eyes, trying to figure out how she'll react to my announcement. I hope she'll be just as supportive as my friends.

"I got accepted into U of T!" I almost scream, shaking her hands out of enthusiasm. She looks at me with wide eyes, a grin forming on her lips. I smile as well and kiss her with frantic emotion.

"That's amazing!" She says but I can tell there's something she's not telling me. In order to pry further, I squint my eyes but still have a smile so she knows I'm not upset at her for whatever she has to say.

"But..." I start to help her find her words.

"It's really far from here." She says with a defeated tone. She's right. I knew it was far but I hadn't really thought about who I'd have to leave behind. Before, I just had friends who are leaving here anyway. Other than my parents, I had nothing to keep me here but now that I'm involved with an adult with a stable job, I have someone who makes me want to stay.

"I hadn't thought of that." I say quietly, trying not to sound upset although I am. I'm not upset at her, I'm upset at myself and this conflict that I've found myself in. Elizabeth takes my jaw in her hand and stokes my cheek gently with her thumb. I'm so grateful for this woman.

"But that's amazing! You should go, Xena. Don't let me keep you from achieving your goals." She says with a grin but I can tell it's faked. I smile anyway, also faking the happiness.

"Listen darling, I can stay. The university here is just as good." I say, actually believing myself. I would stay here for her, I would go anywhere for her.

"Don't kid yourself, dear. Toronto is amazing, you deserve that. I know how hard you've worked to get there." She says with almost angry passion. She really wants the best for me but I don't know what will make me happier, Elizabeth or my dream university. Obviously the answer is Elizabeth but uni is still several months away and relationships are hard.