If I Change *Luke Hemmings*

Five

I woke up to find no one beside me. Luke was gone. He no longer had his arms wrapped around me as if he were protecting me. I could I longer feel his warmth, all that was left was his scent. I looked around expecting him to be somewhere around the room but he wasn't. I waited for him to come back in the room but he never did. It was like he had never been laying next to me. He had dissapeared like a ghost.  I remember waking up like this many times for months. When my parents died i would sleep in their bedroom hoping that somehow it was all a dream and that they'd be lying next to me when i woke up. But they never did, they were gone for good.

I remember having nightmares for 3 months straight. I literally almost went crazy. That is why Ashton made us sell the house and move to this apartment. I was tourturing myself with all the memories our home held. It was all too much and Ashton thought it'd be best for the both of us.

I climbed out of bed and stepped onto the cold floor, shivers running through my body. I walked to the kitchen hoping Luke had made himself at home and decided to eat some breakfast but when i walked in there was only Ashton sitting at the island. He was sitting quietly eating what looked to be oatmeal. Once Ash spotted me he lifted his head up and smiled at me. I knew that smile, it wasn't his normal smile, he was giving me his sympathy smile.

"He left this" Ashton said handing me a piece of paper

"Did he say why he left?"

Ashton shook his head and walked out the kitchen making no eye contact with me. Ashton is the kind of person that shows emotion by the look in his eyes. I know he's hiding something from me but I know not to push the truth out of him. He'll tell me when he thinks is the best time.

I sat down on a stool and opened up the piece of paper. 

Brooke,                                                                                                                                                        I'm sorry for leaving just like this but i have thought things through. From now on please don't look for me because i don't want to speak to you. If you see me just pretend i'm not there because that is what i will do. I'm sorry if i gave you the wrong idea but you have to know there can be nothing between us. I have made a mistake in trying to be friends with the school's slut. I wont be able to fill in Daniel's shoes and i don't want to be like Daniel. I don't want to fall for someone who will just push me away. I know you only want to have fun but i am not that type of guy. I know we hardly know eachother but i might know more of you than you think. Maybe some day you will change and be the girl i met at the party.  Always, Luke

I finished reading the note and was left completely confused. Luke left and now doesn't want to have anything to do with me. I wasn't trying for him to replace Daniel. I didn't want him and i to be anything like what me and Daniel had. But i guess you can't really expect anything good from me. I was hurt because i thought Luke would be different, i thought he wouldn't judge me because of the person i have been. I thought i could show my real self to him but he left before even getting to know me. He wants me to be the girl he met at the party but i have no memory of who that girl was. I don't remember a single thing of what happened that night and now i can't be who Luke wants me to be. I know i don't even know Luke but there's just something about him. I can't really explain what i am feeling towards him because it only has been a couple of days since we met. I am confused as to what my feelings are, i am not the kind of person to fall for someone but Luke's blue eyes, blonde soft hair and dimpled smile make me want to change that. He makes me want to change.

I didn't go to school, i couldn't stand having to see Luke and pretend that he hadnt slept in the same bed as me that night. I couldn't pretend like i had no idea of who he was when he was asking me to change to the person i had been at a party. It was all stupid, to want to change for a guy you had just met a few days ago. Luke wasn't going to change me not unless he tried hard and obviously he had given up already. Way too soon for my liking.

"So what are you going to do about Luke?" Ashton asked as he took a bite of the pizza we had ordered.

"Nothing. He wants me to be someone i have no memory of" 

"You just can't leave things like that Brooke.."

"Yes i can. He doesn't even want to speak to me" I sighed

"Talk to him. i know he will change his mind."

"Only if i change.."

A/N: I know. This was super boring but it was kind of just a filler chapter. I will update today again so hopefully the next chapter will be good :) Remember to Vote Comment and Follow. Love you! Kay Bye! :)

~PolishGirl_