If I Change *Luke Hemmings*

Eight

"Go after him!" Mike exclaimed.

I ran after him but he was already gone. I searched all around the house, through all the sweaty people but had no luck. I then ran outside and found him sitting under a tree, picking at the grass, looking lost in thought.

"Luke.." i whispered, loud enough to get his attention.

He looked up at me and looked back down.

"Luke please hear me out" I begged

"WHAT BROOKE?! WHAT DO YOU WANT?! TO TELL ME THAT ALL THIS TIME YOU WERE PLAYING ME LIKE A FOOL AND THAT ALL THIS TIME YOU'VE STILL BEEN HOOKING UP WITH DANIEL?! TO TELL ME THAT YOU ARE STILL THE SAME SLUT THAT DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT WHAT OTHERS FEEL?! BECAUSE IF THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SAY THEN SAVE YOUR BREATH BROOKE, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT! AND YOU CERTAINLY DON'T HAVE TO KEEP PRETENDING TO HAVE INTEREST IN ME BECAUSE I'M NOT BUYING IT!"

It hurt. Luke thinks it was all a joke and that i never cared about him. What hurt the most was knowing that I hurt Luke. I have to admit that at first i was not a fan of him but now I couldn't be happier to have him by my side. Luke is different and I like that. With Luke I feel like i'm special and that I can be myself. Luke has some sort of effect on me, I want to be better, I want to be good enough for him. I would never joke with Luke's feelings.

"I care about you Luke, i was never pretending..I'm still that girl you met at that party... I'm sorry" 

"I Cant Do This Brooke... I just can't. I thought that I could help fix you but I didn't realize I could get cut while picking up your broken pieces."

"Luke please.." i begged, tears threatning to spill

"I'm sorry but I too don't want to get hurt.." he sighed

"Would that girl at that party have hurt you?"

I might not remember what I was like at that party but I know that she wouldn't hurt Luke. I know that I was different than how I would have been around my so called friends because Luke wouldn't have wanted to be with someone like that, he wouldn't have wanted to be with a girl who sleeps with every guy, with someone who drinks and doesn't have a care about the world. He would want someone that wasn't me..

Luke seemed out of words. He just stood there watching me as if he wanted to figure me out. Or maybe he was just trying to picture me as the girl he once saw me as. Maybe he was trying to remember who i was and who I really am. Or maybe he was just trying to convince himself that I wouldn't hurt him, that he could trust me.

He looked down at his phone and sighed, "I need to take you home. I promised Ashton i'd take you back by midnight"

We walked back to his car without speaking. As we rode back home I didn't ask for Luke's forgiveness, I didn't ask for him to hear me out anymore, I stayed quiet. Maybe giving Luke some silence would get him to clear out his head and think about what he really wanted. It'd let me think about what I wanted as well. I want Luke, as a friend or maybe even more than a friend, it doesn't matter I just want him close to me. I know that when i'm around Luke I am better and I like that. I like Luke.. The ride was taking longer than when we drove to Mike's house but i guess it was because Luke was driving slower than usual and he took the long way home. I guess it'd give us more time to think.

Luke parked infront of Ashton and I's apartment and turned off the ignition. Luke just sat there holding on to the steering wheel and layed his head against it. We sat there in silence, waiting for the other to make the first move. I wasn't going to do it, Luke knew what I wanted and what I would say, now I was just waiting to know what he had decided. After about 10 minutes of us just sitting there in silence I gave up on him saying anything and decided to get out the car.