Because I'm a Girl

Chapter 1

     Excitement coursed through me as I bolted down the crowded hallway of my school. I had waited since freshman year to join the Gamers club and now that I was a senior in high school, I finally had the chance to join. Grinning to myself, uncaring if anyone thought I was crazy, I soared to the room it was located in.

     Nearing the room, I skidded to a stop, straightened myself out, and then paused in front of the door leading to where the club was held in. I was hoping I could become best friends with the members since we could bond over our passion for video games, so I took a deep breath in before entering the room. 

     And upon entering the room, I stilled at the door as all twenty of the guys in the room whipped their heads to look at me. They either sat at desks or stood around random areas of the small classroom, and one of them stood behind the teachers desk in front of the blackboard. All of their jaws dropped at the sight of me. 

     "Hi," I said, hoping to snap them out of whatever was happening. "I'm here to join the Gamers Club."

     The guys didn't respond. They kept staring at me as if I was some sort of rare species, which made my heart stutter with nerves. Was something wrong with me?

     "You want to join?" the guy who stood behind the teacher's desk sputtered out, finally snapping out of his daze. His brown eyes were full of pity and his brown hair was a mess.

     "Yeah," I said, eyebrows furrowing. "That's why I'm here."

     All the guys glanced at each other as if to communicate with each other They looked uncomfortable and I wondered why. What I had done?  

     After a moment the guy who had spoken said, "I'm Jerry, the president of the club, and I'm sorry but there's no more open spots left in the club."

     "What?" I said, deflating. "How is that possible? The club literally just started."

     "I'm sorry," he said awkwardly. "It's just the case."

     I couldn't believe it. I had waited three years to join the club and it was unbelievable I couldn't. As my heart sunk deeper and deeper, weighing me to my spot, I couldn't help but fight for it.

     "Is there no way you can squeeze one more member?" I asked. "It's been my biggest dream to join this club."

     "Sorry, but we can't," Jerry said, his eyes apologetic.

     "For sure? Like it's seriously impossible to have one more member?"

     To my surprise, another guy blurted out, "The problem isn't that, it's you."

     My eyes flew to who had spoken and they landed on a slightly overweight guy, who hard dark brown hair and brown eyes. He was flushing now, looking ashamed of what he said, and my heart jolted. My eyebrows furrowed as annoyance began to surge within me.  

     "Excuse me. What do you mean it's me?" I asked.

     The guy's eyes darted away and Jerry paled. Confused, my eyes probed him, waiting for an answer.

     "I want an answer," I demanded when no one spoke. "What's going on?"

     "You're a girl," Jerry blurted out. "We don't allow girls to join the club."

     My eyes widened as I became flabbergasted. Stunned, I gaped at him, unable to believe his words. Although my gender made me lost rights at home, I hadn't expected to find it in school, too. Thinking we were educated enough to believe everyone was equal, I couldn't believe my peers.

     "Why does it matter that I'm a girl?" I asked, trying to stay calm. "What does that have to do with anything?"

     "Girls... aren't as good as guys at playing video games," Jerry said gently, as if trying to tame a lioness. "We verse others nationally and we need the best players to be in this club."

     "What the hell? Gender doesn't define how good you are at video games."

     Everyone looked awkward and I grew furious. Because I was sick of it. I was sick of being treated differently because of my gender, so I erupted as anger flooded out of me. 

     "You guys are sexist pigs!" I snapped. "Being a girl doesn't define your abilities. I'm good at video games and I swear I can beat all of you at them."

     "That's cute," someone said behind me. "But our decision has been made. We don't care about your abilities because this club is an all boys club."

     I whirled around to see who had spoken and I tensed when I realized it was Josh, one of the popular guys at school, standing in front of me. His blue eyes looked bored as he summed me up and I stared back, annoyed.

     "You guys are discriminating against girls," I spat. "Were you guys born in the nineteenth century or something?"

     Josh rolled his eyes and I wanted to scream. I felt like I had wasted three years of my life at that moment. I couldn't believe people like him were what the Gamers Club consisted of.

     "Sorry the world sucks," Josh said, sounding bored. "Guess you're just going to have to suck it up."

     I had never wanted to punch someone more than in that moment. But taking a deep breath in, I chose to storm off. Knowing how close minded you had to be if you thought such things about girls, there was no point in arguing with them. So, I stalked off, fuming as I tried to fight back my disappointment. 

*****

     "I hate boys!" I shouted, storming into the kitchen.

     My mom was at the sink, washing some dishes as water poured out of the faucet. She was wearing an orange sari, looking stunning despite her age, but the expression she wore left me taken aback. Her dark brown eyes were filled with anger and I stopped in my spot, realizing what I'd done.

     "Sarah, didn't I tell you to wash the dishes," she snapped.

     "Sorry Mom, I forgot," I said. I had gone through this conversation plenty of times and I was so, so tired of it.

     "You always forget Sarah. Don't you ever think about me and how much work I do?"

     Guilt flooded into me at her words. I hadn't meant to forget. It was an accident and I wished my mom understood that.

     "I'm sorry," I said. "But Aiden is always home. Why don't you ever ask him?"

     "Aiden is a boy," she scolded. "Boys aren't supposed to do housework."

     "Why not?"

     "Because that's just how it is."

     I couldn't help but grow furious at her words. After being told that because I was a girl I had to suffer by my peers already, I couldn't bear to hear it again. Because I hated how the way I was born defined me. I hated how I was treated differently for something I couldn't control.

     But because my mom would never listen, I decided instead of arguing, I would leave. So I whirled around and stormed up the staircase next to the kitchen, and into my room.

     And for the millionth time in my life, I wished I wasn't a girl. So I wouldn't have to face these stupid issues, I wished I had all the rights in the world, so I could do what made me happy. But sadly, that wasn't my life and because I was a girl, I was left to suffer.