Because I'm a Girl

Chapter 18

A week had gone by and once again, I was standing in front of my club members. My eyes were trying to remain on the ground, but they found themselves moving up, towards the back of the room. That was where Josh sat, playing a game on his phone.

I wasn't sure why, but I hadn't expected him to join. Although he seemed serious at the time, I had hoped he'd been bluffing. I had hoped he had said it in a desperate attempt to make me forgive him, but now he was in my club. He sat alone and away from everyone else, but he was present and I found my heart racing.

"The video game event is next week," I said, bringing everyone's attention to me. "How's everything been going?"

"Mr. Lowe is letting us borrow four TVs and I'm getting a few of my friends to bring their consoles," Will said. "Our equipment is all set."

"Perfect," I said, smiling. "How's promoting, Emily?"

"Great," she said, grinning. "People were reluctant about coming at first because it's after school, but I really hyped it up. I kind of bribed them with food, too... but it worked. I know at least fifty people who are coming."

I laughed lightly at that. Sometimes I wished we didn't have to stoop to bribing others with food, but if that meant more people would listen to our words, I was content. We were still in the progress of making our club big and known, so I was willing to try anything.

"Sarah, I'm sorry but I don't know where we can hold our event," Amy said, looking defeated. "I tried looking everywhere, but... I can't think of anything that'll be big enough and open for us to use."

I frowned at that and grew panicked when I realized I had no idea of what room we could use. Most rooms were closed off and even if we could use them, they weren't big enough. My heart raced as I realized we had one week to figure it out.

"There's this room in the basement," Josh said, bringing my eyes to him. "It's huge and has a bunch of round tables and chairs. It'll have enough room for the TVs and guests."

"Would it be okay for us to use after school?" I asked.

"Yes."

Immediately, I grew relieved and I sighed. Aaron shot me a reassuring look at that, trying to tell me everything was fine, and I smiled at him. He smiled back and remembering Josh had given the idea, my eyes flew to him. I was about to shoot him a small smile, but I became surprised when I saw him staring at Aaron. His face was unreadable, but I still frowned when I noticed he was studying Aaron.

"How's food?" I asked Aaron.

"Awesome," Aaron said. "I got my dad's friend to hook us up with pizza, chips and soda, so we're set."

"Perfect," I said, growing excited once again. "Everything seems to be working out. But, I need one or two of you to help me set up. Are any of you willing to?"

"I am," Aaron said.

"I'll come, too," Josh said.

I fought back a look of surprise as I looked at Josh. He had his arms crossed over his chest and he was staring at me, his face unreadable. I continued to stare at him, wondering why he volunteered. Having him join my club was already a surprise, so having him participate was stunning.

"Sounds good," I said, snapping out of it. "Well, I guess that's all for today. Thanks for coming everyone, you're free to leave."

Everyone began to get out of their seats then. As they passed me, they said their goodbyes and left, leaving Josh, Aria and I the only ones left in the room. Josh was the type to take his sweet time, so my eyes went to Aria who walked towards me.

"I'm super sorry Sarah, but I have to see Mr. Walter," Aria said. "I'll see you in fourth period, okay?"

"That's fine," I said, smiling. "I'll see you then."

Aria smiled back and quickly rushed off, leaving me alone with Josh. My eyes went to him and they widened when I saw him walking towards me. His eyes were on mine and I couldn't help but stare back. Something about Josh left my eyes clinging onto him and I didn't know what.

"Hey," Josh said, stopping in front of me. "If there's anything I can do to help, you can tell me. I'm willing to help as much as I can."

My jaw nearly dropped at his words, but I fought back the urge as I stared at him, unable to believe he would say that. Josh wanting to be in my club had been a mission of mine. It was something I had to work hard for and having him willingly want to help out didn't make sense to me. It happened so suddenly that I couldn't help but grow defensive.

"What changed?" I asked. "Why do you care about my club all of the sudden?"

Josh didn't answer immediately. He stared at me and I stared back. But when I noticed a look in his eyes that made my heart skip a beat, I was left feeling nervous.

"This club matters to you, so I'll help you as much as I can," Josh said, shrugging nonchalantly. "That's why I'm here."

My heart began to pound against my chest at his words. I had never expected them and I was unsure of their sincerity, but his eyes told me otherwise. His eyes told me he was being genuine and I was left speechless because his words touched me. They made me feel warm and blushing, I looked to the ground, unable to look at Josh any longer.

"I'm still mad at you," I mumbled, hating the way I was feeling. "You can't just feed me these word and expect me to forgive you."

"I know," Josh said. "And I understand. I know I'm not perfect and I can be a jerk at times, but... I want to show you I'm not a complete douche. I know it's shocking, but I have a heart."

Rolling my eyes, I couldn't help but smile. I looked up at Josh and he smiled back at me, which left my heart feeling lighter. A part of me was angry because deep down, I was forgiving Josh. Seeing him trying to make a difference in my club for me was touching, which left me unable to hate him. Sighing lightly, I knew I never hated him in the first place and deep down, never would.