Because I'm a Girl

Chapter 5

Aria and I stood in the classroom that my club was held in - a small room with a teachers desk set in front of the blackboard and rows of seats in front of it. We were leaning against the teacher's desk and we observed the three members of my club. My heart sunk when ten minutes passed and no one else came to join our first lunch meeting.

Analyzing my members, I sighed at the realization of who exactly joined. Only one boy had joined. His name was Will and he was tall and lanky. He was also desperate, which I was pretty sure was why he joined my club that was predominantly girls.  

Amy, a short, chubby girl - who I had many classes with also joined. She didn't have any friends and was very awkward, which made me feel a bit bad for her. She was socially awkward and she often joined clubs in hopes of fitting in.

Emily, a tall, gorgeous blond was the other girl who had joined and she was the opposite of Amy, meaning she was the life of the party and full of spirit. But, she joined every club. It wasn't like she was passionate about any of them, so my heart sunk at the realization of why all three of them were here. I had expected so much more.

Will, Amy and Emily were all staring at me, awaiting the start of our club. I told them to wait because people may be late, but I'd been too hopeful in thinking that. No one else wanted to join. I was naive to think my club would be popular.

"Should I start?" I whispered to Aria.

"Yeah," Aria said, looking just as disappointed as I felt.

"Hey everyone, welcome to I'm Proud of Who I Am," I said, smiling at my members. "I created this club because I realized that even in the twenty-first century, girls are being treated as if they're inferior to guys. I hate this mentality, so with this club I hope to spread awareness that everyone is equal."

I paused. I awaited some sort of acknowledgement - some sort of validation that this club was a good idea, but everyone but Emily looked bored. Sighing lightly, I hoped lunch would end soon.

"I'm not sure what we're going to do yet to spread awareness, but we'll figure it out together as a team," I said. "Thank you for joining. Do you have any questions?"

To my surprise, Will raised his hand. I brightened up and nodded at him, encouraging him to ask his question.

"Is this club every Wednesday?" he asked.

"Yes, but we'll be doing stuff outside of the weekly meetings, too," I said, smiling.

"Dammit," he mumbled under his breath.

My cheeks reddened and with every second that passed, I grew more and more disappointed. No one was passionate about spreading awareness. No one seemed to care about anything I said. I knew I shouldn't have came in with high expectations, but I had and now I felt absolutely pathetic. 

Emily's eyes sailed to the door and lingered there for a moment, looking curious. My eyes followed hers, wondering if someone else was joining, but my heart dropped at the sight of Josh standing there, analyzing my club. When his eyes met mine, embarrassment washed over me, but I held my ground.

Josh's blue eyes remained on mine for a moment and I stared back, not knowing what to do. He was expressionless and I had no idea what he was thinking, but I had a bad feeling he was laughing at me on the inside. I wouldn't blame him, given the circumstances.

Eventually, Josh turned around and walked off, leaving me relieved he hadn't said anything to make me feel worse. I sighed and glanced at the clock, realizing there was still half an hour left. There was nothing else I wanted to say and everyone seemed to be dozing off, so I decided to end the meeting short.

"There's not much we can do because this is the first meeting, so you guys are free to leave," I said. "I hope to see you next Wednesday."

Without a word, everyone got up and left without saying goodbye. And eventually, Aria and I were alone in the classroom. I let out a breath, running my fingers through my long, black hair.

"I... I didn't expect that," I said, looking at Aria. "I thought there would be so many more people and I thought they would be passionate about this club. I'm disappointed."

"Don't be, Sarah," Aria said gently. "This is a brand new club and this was the first meeting. This wasn't a horrible start and I know things will get better."

"I have a bad feeling things are going to get worse."

"No," Aria said. "All of us who have joined are going to recruit more members. I guess that's going to be our first task before we start promoting awareness."

I knew that had to be the case. With five people in our club, no one would take our club seriously. We were going to have to recruit more members before we bothered to do anything else.

"You're right," I said, smiling sadly. "Okay, next week we're going to start promoting this club like crazy. The posters proved to be pointless, so we need to take matters into our own hands."

"Yes," Aria said. "Don't be too disappointed Sarah, this club is going to make a difference. It's not going to be a waste of time."

Aria sounded so confident that I finally genuinely smiled. The first meeting had been horrible, but it was just the start. We had nine more months of school left, we were going to make a difference. I just had to remain positive to make it happen.

"You're right," I said, grinning at Aria. "Okay, we're going all out next week when it comes to promoting. We're going to be screaming and influencing people to join. We can do this."

"Yes, we'll do that." Aria laughed lightly. "Sarah, you're doing a good thing. Seriously."

I smiled at Aria, touched by her words. Sometimes I felt like I was overreacting to the situations I'd been through, but Aria had always been understanding and supportive. She was my best friend and for the millionth time, I was thankful for her existence.