Miss Cloudwalker (COMPLETED BUT MAJOR EDITING)

Chapter 19

 After I showered, I made my way downstairs. Grammy sat at the table, sipping at a steaming mug. She smiled softly at me as I walked towards her. I sat down besides her and she sighed. The older woman reached across the table and tightly grasped my hands. I could see her eyes shining with unshed tears and I felt a twinge in my heart. What I've done has hurt her.

She smiled, "when you were little, I always knew that when you grew up and found yourself, you would lose yourself."

I frowned, raising my eyebrows at her. I had no idea what that meant. She sighed, stirring her drink.

"You always managed to be so happy—no matter what—I knew that once you lost your child, you would fully lose that part of you to become your adult," Grammy sighed, looking at me, "with how messed up your childhood was, it was bound to happen."

Her words sent a chill down my body. Was that what was happening to me lately? I was drowning in order to learn how to swim. I noticed my mom listening in from the sink. She winced at Grammy's words, her hands tightly clutching the white sink. I didn't feel bad for her though, because it was the honest truth of what happened.

"So when I lose myself, I lose everyone around me?" I choked out. My thoughts drifted back to Ethan and a lump formed in my throat. I always had been told change was good—but it didn't feel great.

As if she read my mind, "in order for something good to happen, something bad has to strike."

"But—"

"Was Ethan ever any good for you? You need someone who will take it slow with you and always put you first," she pressed. Tears forced their way to my eyes and I blinked them away. I didn't want to lose him forever, "you have to start thinking for yourself."

Her words triggered something that I absolutely hated. I had been thinking for myself these months. Now look where I was, my mind was on myself and everyone walked out the door. Aleah thought I was crazy, Violet thought me vain, Mia saw me as a thief, and Ethan... I didn't want to know what Ethan thought about me. My sadness turned to anger so fast, like lightning struck me.

I stood up, the chair skittering across the floor. I stared down at Grammy and then around the room. My fists clenched and I grit my teeth. My whole body shook with the effort not to scream and smash something. I turned around and dashed for the front door. God, I needed to get out of here.

I slammed through the door and hurried down the steps. I didn't bother with shoes. I ran across the cold pavement, my bare feet burning every time they hit the ground. I passed Grammy's car and continued running. My arms were wrapped around me. I heard someone rushing after me but I kept running.

I crossed the street and into the park. There was nobody. I ran by the large water fountain, the huge, bare oak trees, and didn't stop. I didn't want to stop I wanted to run away from the problems that nipped at my heels. The footsteps were still following me.

"Seraphina!" It was Aaron's voice that washed over me.

His arms wrapped around me, pulling a struggling me to him. I screamed, begging him to let me go. Begging for him to let me run and get out of here. He didn't reply, he just ran a hand through my hair and murmured comforting words. My screams turned into cries and I sagged in his arms. I sobbed, covering my eyes. I was so done. I just wanted to leave this. I couldn't wait to graduate and get the hell out.

We stood in silence, his warmth spreading into my body. I accepted it with a grace and closed my eyes. He turned me around and I looked up into his eyes. Their golden glow was enticing, I felt like I could get lost in them. I let myself, letting myself forget about Ethan, about a pain that wouldn't leave.