Routes,Hope and Fam

13

Rose

Present time

Most of us sink deep down in our sorrows.We sink down so deep we forget what was it like to get back up,what did the other world look like,feel like all that happens is you keep drowning and drowning.It feels like someone has held your head and is holding onto you and pushing you deep into the ocean.They are never letting you get back up,they hold onto you until you cant breathe anymore and it's all over.
Life was all over,but there was something I had to hold onto something I had to make worth to live.But there was nothing so I held onto myself.My own anchor because nobody could be an anchor not a thing a pet or a human.We have got no humanity and are a disgrace.

Aren't we?

We see someone get brutally beaten up and we stand there filming it screaming to hit harder fight more and then go home and tweet " We want justice"
"Pray for this and that" but do we really mean it.Nobody means it if we did we would have stood up for the smallest reasons,we would first of all stop bullying and degrading everyone.
Aren't we all the same? Has God made us any different.We are all the same but keep different mentalities,we say we aren't racist but you never went upto the girl in the hallway who was getting bullied,we don't go upto a guy who was getting beaten up for being gay,we chose colors and sizes.

Are you so perfect yourself?
We all have our stories,we say we are sorry when someone dies.Are you really? We go back to the same life forgetting the mother the daughter the son the wife or the husband has lost someone.When someone tells you about them we say I get you but you don't,you might think but no you haven't been through it and you don't want to even think about it because the smallest of smallest bothers.We might have the same pain too but everyone feels it in different ways.Some of us lose ourselves,our self esteems our persuasion and most of us our lives.

Sigh

A few months back I went on a short noticed wedding.Some of us can't see the pain behind anyone's eyes but the ones who do they read your mind,your feelings and how strong or weak are you.

"What are your plans for the future Rose" Aunt Jenna asked me
She is a wonderful person,she's an educated and a very looking upto life person m.She looks at life in the most beautiful and motivational way.
"I am interested in media,fashion designing and photography most probably but I want a strong degree in my hand and to fulfill moms dreams at the same time I'll do engineering first and then the courses I want to take up"
"You sound very enthusiastic and work oriented"
"You are the first one telling me that"
"I am a Psychiatrist and a very good friend of your moms"
"Mom told me tons about you but I think she missed out the most important detail,how is your work? Do you enjoy it?"
"I truly do love my job,it's filled with passion and it's amazing how you get to know people's pain"
"You enjoy listening to others pain?"
"No honey I meant how they have gone through so much,like a few weeks back my assistant Anastasia needed a bit of help she was a beautiful girl,short blonde hair,blue eyes tall and timid,she was loving and loved her life.She was wild,crazy and caring at the same time"
"She sounds amazing but did you say was?"
"Yes I did unfortunately.I wished I dint have to.She took her life"she sighed
"Mind if I ask why?"
"She had the perfect  boyfriend Ricky he took care of her loved her with all his heart he worked in the airlines he was a pilot,they shared a beautiful house  together,they were about to have a baby,a few days before her delivery he left for work and promised to return,Anastasia's father never approves of her and Ricky's relationship he kicked her out of the house when he heard she was pregnant, The next day Ricky proposed and they were gonna get married after the child was out  into the world but they never did,before the boy could see his Son the plane crashed,the time of birth of the son was the time of death of the father,Anastasia found out about this and couldn't control herself she wanted to end it all but she had to live for him,the only reason she was alive was Him her son who reflected his father,who was so flawless but not every father is as amazing as Ricky could be or anyone. Anastasia's father wanted her to get married to his best friends son who was a complete fuckbo-
"WHY WOULD THE FATHER DO THAT? WHAT WAS HE GETTING FOR IT"
"Money he was getting money"
"He wanted to sell his daughter?"
She nodded.I couldn't believe it.
"What about the son?"
"He was poisoned"
"WHERE THE HELL WAS THE MOTHER?"
"She herself was used,she would get beaten up and used for money"
"Is the mom still alive?"
"She is and still living in her brutal world"
"Why dint she report,go to the police?"
"The fathers best friend worked in the police"
"FBI OR CHILD ABUSE THINGY PEOPLE OR ANYTHING"
"There is nothing that could be done there were men involved from many places"
"How did she take her life?"
I said with a tear falling down my right cheek
"She hanged herself but when they checked up her body she had many scars and burns."
"Is that prick of the father still alive?"
"I am not sure I changed states since then so I haven't seen anyone"

How can people be this brutal? Is there any humanity left?
NO

"Look up,into my eyes"I looked up locking my gaze with hers
"You have been through something's and it's hard to get over them.You can't find peace and pray to god to end everything"
"WHAT! That's not true.Are you a vodoo witchyy thingy too?" I said tryna change the topic

How?

"I have got my tricks,you can come upto me anytime"
"I am fine.I don't need help"
"You are not fine,you need help but you deny the fact that you need help"
"You mean mental help?"
"No.Someone you can open upto for better ways to look at life and your future.You deeply believe in love and are very passionate about it"
"Oh come on.Phffff"
"It's ok.Its good to have passion about it some never believe in it don't lose it there's still light at the end of the tunnel catch it Rose it's yours run towards it,don't let it go no one can snatch your spotlight"
I looked at her with hope and a future. I won't lose it I will catch it.

                                    ..................
Then next day I woke up with hope and a ray of sunshine.It will take time but I'll live and survive it.
I am gonna graduate with perfect grades,love my friends and always support them and be the greatest daughter I can be.Its not too late I can change things.

"Send me what are you wearing"Paige requested
She wanted to see my graduation dress but it wasn't that easy.
"Nop its a surprise"
"Come on only me no one else please"
"Wait till tomorrow"
"I hate you"
"Love you too"
"COME ON ROSE SEND ME THE PICTURE!"
"NO I AM NOT"
"BUT WHY ITS JUST ME!"
"YOU TALK TO MUCH GOODNIGHT PAIGE"
"DONT YOU DARE HANG UP ON ME"
"BYEEEEE!!!!!"
I cut the call even though I knew she will snap at me tomorrow but it's Paige she barely comes to school.All she does it sleep and eat.

Graduation was in two days and I am pretty excited for it all of us are but at the same time we will all leave but surely meet.WE WILL GET SAMANTHA MARRIED!! SHE HAS TOO!!!!
She's only eighteen but legal to get married.Samantha you are getting married and making beautiful kids so we can become aunties already.
Awwwwieee Sammmy!

                     ——————————————-

-Menahil