Chaos 3| ✔

6|

|Everything.

Rocky

She was beautiful.

So fucking beautiful.

She was everything.

Watching Blayne performing right now still amazed me. Everything from her crowd control, her songs, everyone knowing all the words, and just the support in general really made a nigga feel good. I was grateful and truly happy for her....one hundred percent. Despite everything this woman has been and gone through, for her to still manage to perform, interact and smile with all these people that loved and were affected by her music, blew my mind. If one hadn't truly known B personally, you would never even think that she was going through all the bullshit that she was.

She knew how to put that brave face on.

She knew how to smile, and laugh even when I knew for a fact that she didn't really want too, but that was show business. In this industry, you had to learn how to divide the two when it came to personal and performance. All that personal shit had to stay at the door when you hit that stage.

Period.

And it you didn't know how to, then you were pretty much fucked...in other words, only the strong survive,and B was a soldier. She was currently closing out her set at the Echo here in L.A. I felt like one of the most, proudest, most luckiest muthafuckas in the world right now watching my baby rock the fuck out of that stage. She looked so happy and at peace. It's been two days since we reconciled our friendship, and I have to say that I am extremely grateful and thankful that she's fully forgive me...for everything.

It has def been a bumpy road for us, but I wouldn't change it for shit. From the very first time I met this woman, and got to know her, I've realized just how much she's grown from last year to now...including everything she's had to endure in her life. I've always applauded and gave Blayne her props when it came to her growth and how she handled certain things. I made it a priority to know every single thing she'd been through the last few weeks we were apart. Including the case she's trying to build.

That shit made me nervous.

Real nervous.

Blayne believed she'd been assaulted while unconscious, given she woke up with a hickie on her thigh the next morning. Just hearing her repeat this story made me sick. Like I said, I hated that she did what she did, but this was one of the results that could happen when you did dumb shit. I'm just keeping it real. Despite all this though, I still had B's back...through whatever.

No matter what.

We are not together at the moment,and I really think being good friends is better than being in a full-blown relationship right now. I enjoy the feel of getting to know her all over again. I remember having the biggest crush on her and when she finally did decide to give a nigga a shot, I promised myself I wouldn't fuck it up.

And though we weren't a thing at the moment, there was something about just hanging with her, with no real expectations placed on either of us was actually pretty amazing. I still adored, and still loved the shit out of Blayne.

And I believed that would never stop.

Ever.

There was just this pure thing about and within her that kept me locked and tuned into her no matter what she did. Shit was hella crazy, but true...true indeed.