Say It If It's Worth Saving Me

10. No One Deserved What Happened

"Hey," I greeted Michael in the parking lot.

It was just after Valentine's day and there was a craft show being held at a convention center in up town Sydney. My dad had offered to take me, Ryon, and the boys to the show. However, his car wasn't big enough so Anne offered to drive the boys to the center.

The parking lot was huge and was nearly full of cars. The building was a big, sandy colored block that was rather plain on the outside. The main entrance was towards the southern end of the building to my right.

"Hey, you ready to stare at a bunch over priced ugly necklaces?" He asked.

I giggled as the others joined us.

Ryon was wearing a cute pale pink blouse with blue skinny jeans and some white Toms. Calum was holding her left hand in his right one and was wearing his grey NASA shirt, blue skinny jeans and his black Vans.

Dad had a cane now to help him walk because despite all the therapy and exercises he still had a limp, "You kiddos ready to head inside?"

"Yes," Ashton nodded.

Everyone followed along and I made sure to just stay far enough from Luke that he wouldn't try to talk to me.

It's been almost four weeks since I took apart that pencil sharpener. The thin red lines on my thighs were more like paper cuts than the deep gashes that I had seen online late one night when I wanted to see how much damage someone could do to themself.

I was faking smiles now.

I was crying myself to sleep every night again.

And I couldn't stop it.

I couldn't control whatever this was that was eating me from the inside. The toxic chemicals in my head telling me that I would never be enough for anyone, for anything.

"Jai," Michael said.

I turned to look at him and he showed me his phone, "Check this out."

It was a list of dates and various clubs in different cities, What is this?"

"Concert dates," Michael answered, taking his phone back.

"For what?" I looked back at him.

"Hot Chelle Rae," he answered. "They're coming here and we got our name in the hat and they picked us to open for them."

"That is so cool," I smiled at him.

"We've been writing songs and stuff," He explained excitedly.

I nodded my head as he rambled on about how they had this one song that sounded really punk and this other song that was slower. We reached the front entrance and my dad pulled out the tickets that he had bought in advance.

The lady working at the entry desk looked over at all of us standing there before turning back to my dad with a friendly smile, "Got a whole lot?"

"That one is mine," He gestured at me. "The rest are her friends."

"Ah," she nodded, "Well here ya go and enjoy the day."

"Thank you," dad replied politely, taking the ticket stubs from her.

He stopped us in the hallways just outside the main hall where all of the vendors were. He waited until we were all crowded around, "Alright kids so you all know to behave and be on your best behavior because if you get into trouble that looks bad on me and then what would all of your mums think?"

That made all of us burst out into giggles and then he waved us off. Ryon instantly went off with Calum while Luke and Ashton wandered off. Michael stayed with me as we wandered from stall to stall.