Say It If It's Worth Saving Me

13. I Shouldn't Have Kissed You

 It was insane.

A week after seeing Future Michael again, there was a science project in my class. The teacher said straight from the beginning that she would be picking the partners and other students were already disappointed.

Luke and I got partnered up.

It was the first time he had looked at me in what felt like forever. He gave me a friendly smile as he scooted his desk closer to mine. My heart gave a painful squeeze because that smile meant so much to me and I couldn't have the person it belonged to.

"Hey," he said.

The open notebook on my desk was already filled with notes with information that we would need for the project. Not to mention that it wouldn't take much to type it up into a powerpoint and give the presentation to the rest of the class.

"Let's get the info we need and then I'll make the powerpoint tonight," I suggested.

"Why don't you come over and we can work on it together?" He countered. "We have the whole weekend."

I frowned, "I don't know."

"My mum can buy us that pizza that you really like," he tried. "And we can stop at the store and get some ice cream and snacks and you can spend the night if your dad is okay with it."

Tears burned my eyes and I was struggling to breathe because here was Luke saying something that used to be so normal for us. We hadn't properly talked in months and now he was offering me the most normal thing we used to have.

A sniff escaped me and Luke leaned closer, "Jai, what's wrong?"

I stood up and of course other students turned to look at me and I walked to the front of the room and stopped in front of the teacher's desk.

"May I go outside for a moment?" I asked before sniffling.

"Do you want to go to a counselor?" Miss Peters offered.

"No, I just need a moment," I mumbled before turned and quickly leaving the room.

Once out in the hallway, I leaned against the lockers before sliding down to the floor and curling into a ball. An ugly sob broke out of my chest and my skin hurt from the stretch of being curled up, I could feel the skin tearing open again on my thighs.

The sound of the door to the classroom opened and the flow of chatter with it and then it disappeared as the door closed.

"Jai?" Luke's worried voice asked.

I tried to stay as still as possible but when he sat down next to me, I unfolded and stared hard at my lap as my legs stuck straight out now. My hair falling into my face.

"What's going on?" He asked.

I sighed, "You haven't talked to me in months, let alone look at me and I don't even know why. Are we even friends anymore?"

"Of course we are, that's why I'm trying to invite you over," he replied gently. "I've been a shit friend recently and I wanna make it up to you so please let me."

"Okay," I sniffled.

"Yeah?" He leaned over. "Can I get at least a smile."

I looked at up at him, knowing my face was red and blotchy from crying. I sniffed again and gave him a weak, shaky smile.

"Awesome, so, my mum will pick us up and we'll swing by your place to get clothes before we head to the store and then back to my place," he decided.

I nodded my head and he stood up before offering me a hand and helping me back up onto my own feet. We hugged quickly, a short tight embrace that left my heart racing and leaving me dizzy.