By Any Other Name

Chapter 7

I loved the church that I was raised in and I knew I would probably never find another that I liked near as much, but I could tell almost immediately that this one wouldn't even come close to measuring up. It was going to be a struggle to be attentive here. The reverend was just so very dry. He didn't seem to be preaching as much as reading a letter.

I felt like an awful person for having such negative thoughts, not to mention a terrible example for Cassie and Jack. I had to keep forcing my attention away from the parishioners and lovely decorations around the sanctuary, and onto the reverend.

Honestly though, the message wasn't very thought-provoking. I enjoyed being challanged to be a better person in my faith and to learn new things about the Bible. All this man seemed to be doing was going over the most basic things - love all God's creatures and forgive those who trespass against you.

I got the feeling that he was aiming to keep it simple so as not to offend anyone, but ironically I had to try not to be irritated. After everything I endured with Charles, I did not feel like loving or forgiving him. God could if He chose to, but I never would. Not that Charles would ever dream of asking for forgiveness.

Once the service was over, I was able to talk with some of the people. They were very nice, and I was grateful that they all seemed so interested in the fact that I was from England, that they almost asked no truly personal questions.

It was also wonderful to get to interact with women my own age again. That was something I wasn't able to do since before I married Charles. But I met several ladies who I could see myself becoming great friends with in the future.

One woman, Grace let me hold her baby. Little Matthew was adorably chubby with curly blonde hair and he seemed to have the sweetest disposition, constantly cooing and smiling. But after a few minutes of watching him, my mind wandered to a painful memory. I hastily handed the boy back to his mother, feigning a sneeze to explain the sudden moisture in my eyes.

Time seemed to pass so quickly as I got to know the people of the church. Before I knew it Cassie was beside me, informing me that Levi was waiting with the wagon outside.

I'd been speaking with a perfectly nice couple, Mr. and Mrs. Snedeker, and I was surprised by Cassie's rude interruption. I was about to give her a mild reprimand but decided to hold tongue when I noticed the expression she was directing at Mrs. Snedeker. It was a cold and hard look, and like nothing I'd seen from the girl in the short time I'd known her.

Bewildered, I stared at Cassie for a moment until she met my eyes again, her expression softening. Without another word, she turned and walked out the door.

I was ready to apologize to the couple but when I fixed my attention on them, I was shocked into keeping quiet again.

Mrs. Snedeker watched Cassie go, wearing a contemptible look. She turned to me again and my impression of her diminished significantly. Other than to take on a dubious quality, her face didn't change much from the way she stared after Cassie.

"You, ah, know that child?" Her tone was unmistakably haughty.

Utterly confused, it took me a moment to answer.

"Yes," I said. "Cassie is one of my students." And then feeling like a fraud for claiming to be an actual teacher, I added, "I'm staying with Minnie Porter, and she asked me to help out. I've never actually taught before but I'm quite enjoying it. The children are so sweet. It really doesn't seem like work at all." I rambled, not encouraged by her increasingly distasteful sneer.

"Well that's just lovely." It was hard to miss the sarcasm dripping from her voice. "But we really must be going." She looked at her husband. "Come along, Dear."

Feeling dazed, I watched her scurry away. She didn't go far - certainly not home the way she implied when she ran off. She only went far enough to begin a conversation with someone else before beckoning her husband, who was still standing with me, to follow.

When I met his gaze, I was even more confused and troubled. He didn't seem nearly as superior as his wife had but he was watching me in a more disturbing way. He was smiling, but not in the amiable way he was before. This smile was more of a leer and had a definite predatory feel.

"Good day." I nodded to him before hurrying after Cassie, eager to get away from the man.

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The whole way home, my mind went over what happened in those last few moments in the church. The only possible explanation for Mr. and Mrs. Snedeker to behave as they did was Cassie. Was it because she was an orphan? Why should that matter? And what did that have to do with me?

People tended to look down on orphans but I'd never seen such contempt directed at one before.

Was that the reason Minnie didn't go to church?

But that couldn't be it. She expected the children to go and I knew she was no hypocrite. Besides, the thoughts of one or two ignorant people shouldn't matter that much. It shouldn't cause a person to stay away completely. Particularly not someone like Minnie.

But still, why should Cassie's status as an orphan cause Mrs. Snedeker to be so unashamedly rude? And why should it make her husband feel free to stare at me in such a brazen way?

None of it made sense, and I wished I could ask someone what was going on. It didn't seem like my place to get involved though, the Snedeker's behavior toward me notwithstanding.

"You feelin' alright?" Levi's voice startled me and I looked around, realizing that we were parked in front of the house. The children must have all gone inside already as the back of the wagon was deserted.

"What?" I shook my head lightly to clear the fog.

"You haven't given me a reproachful look even once since you sat down," he teased and I fought a small smile.

"I'm just...thinking."

"I can see that," he said, more serious. "You seem upset though."

"I..." I thought about asking him about it but I doubted that he'd even know. If he didn't go to church, why should he know about the way a few of the people reacted to Cassie? He wouldn't be able to offer more than I could speculate. Besides, for some reason it felt too personal.

"I'm alright," I said. "Just thinking about the sermon."

"Deep and thought provoking, was it?"

The slight edge in his tone surprised me. As did his apparent insight into the preaching style of the reverend who he didn't bother to stay and listen to. In all honesty, I'd already forgotten nearly everything that was said in the sermon.

I didn't want to think about how he knew I was lying or what he thought was actually bothering me. Before he had the chance to ask anything else, I jumped down from the wagon seat to the ground.

"Thank you for driving us to church, Levi," I said over my shoulder as I hurried to the door of the house.