Only If

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Genre: Angst

Everyone knows that Lee Jihoon has a thing for his best friend, Kwon Soonyoung. But Soonyoung has a thing for Lee Seokmin.

-

"Jihoon, come on. What happened?" Jeonghan asked the younger for the nth time. They're currently at the living room together with the other members, Seungcheol, Joshua, Seungkwan, Dino and Mingyu. Jihoon slumped back on his seat and sighed heavily.

"Come on, hyung. You can tell it to us." Dino, the youngest, said. Jihoon closed his eyes.

"Nothing. Its just that... I don't know. I feel tired." Jihoon mumbled. The others looked at each other with their eyes full of worry.

"Jihoon-ah. You know you can tell us if you have a problem, right?" Jeonghan said. Jihoon's eyes traveled towards the direction of the kitchen and wow. What a view.

Just as his eyes reached the kitchen door, Soonyoung and Seokmin went out from the kitchen while laughing and too close to each other for Jihoon's liking. Jihoon chuckled.

"I'm perfectly fine."

-

"Jihoonnie!" Jihoon stopped midway from his steps towards his room after hearing that sweet voice calling his name.

After while, he felt an arm wrapped around his shoulder. He already smelled the mix of sweat and vanilla scent that he was fond of. Soonyoung.

"Hey. What's up?" Soonyoung asked Jihoon while smiling. Jihoon didn't answer but just sighed.

Soonyoung thought Jihoon was tired so he just chuckled and ruffled the younger's hair.

"You should sleep already, Jihoon. You need it." Soonyoung said before kissing Jihoon's forehead.

Damn you, Kwon Soonyoung.

-

Its only 2 weeks before Seventeen's comeback and the boys were now practicing for their live performance on their comeback stage. Since the choreography for this comeback is quite strong, the boys need to work extra hard so that they won't make a mess.

Jihoon, who was actually tired from revising and producing songs, was the one who always and has the most mistake while practicing. Although everyone said that it's okay and they do understand, Jihoon can't help it but be mad at himself for not being enough.

They're having a water break and Jihoon was currently sitting on a corner of their practice room. As he drinks his water, he kept on thinking and reprimanding himself for being not enough and soon to be useless.

And then his eyes landed on him.

On them.

Of course he won't be enough, he thinks.

He doesn't have the normal tallness just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have that amazing smile that can cure cancer just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have that bright personality that can boost everyone's mood just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have that amazing voice that can make an old man cry because of it's pureness just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have that fast learner's skill to learn their dance steps easily just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have those hands that Soonyoung always want to hold just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have those cheeks that Soonyoung always want to kiss just like Seokmin's.

He doesn't have Soonyoung's heart because it's already Seokmin's.

Drowned with his own thought, Jihoon didn't even realize that everyone were already huddled up around him worriedly since Jihoon is staring at a distance with lots of tears flowing from his eyes.

"Jihoon-ah, what's wrong? Is there something that happened?" Joshua asked the younger. Jihoon looked up at them with helpless and sad eyes, which made the others sad as well because this is a rare sight of their Jihoon who always shows of that strong aura. This Jihoon in front of them is like a Jihoon who has no one else anymore. Seungkwan got teary eyed actually.

"Hyung..." Dino whispered after hearing Jihoon's faint sobs. A few more moments, Jihoon broke down ito more tears and started sobbing and whimpering. The other members felt so bad because they feel useless. They can't even do something for Jihoon.

So instead, they settled on hugging the younger.

Soonyoung and Seokmin, who decided to just watch the scene, just stared at Jihoon sadly.

Jihoon, who felt two pairs of eyes that he doesn't want to look at him, started crying more.

The fact that Soonyoung is not his and will never be started sinking on his mind.

ㅡㅡ

guess who's back with an angst haha

this is actually what i felt rn im literally jihoon right at this moment

i mean i can't be her so what's the point of fighting lol

i only want kyle to be happy and i know he will never find happiness with me so lol omg what the heck am i saying i don't even love someone ew

will be back with fluff probably

or smut

ha

-💜
784 words

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