Gallavich Fluff & Smut

Us

By: Misti1987

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Summary:

"This is you breaking up with me?" Mickey says more as a question than a statement and he doesn't know what to do. He should just say yes, let him go, set him free. He never thought that letting Mickey go would be so fucking hard, but it was like stabbing himself in the chest repeatedly and for the first time he felt so much pain.

"I should," Ian says quietly and Mickey looks at him.

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Gallavich week - July 19 - alternate season 5 ending
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Ian stood on those steps, feeling broken and needing for it to all go away, everything was a mess, his boyfriend standing in front of him, saying things that he had always wanted him to say, and yet he stood there motionless.

"This is you breaking up with me?" Mickey says more as a question than a statement and he doesn't know what to do. He should just say yes, let him go, set him free. He never thought that letting Mickey go would be so fucking hard, but it was like stabbing himself in the chest repeatedly and for the first time he felt so much pain.

"I should," Ian says quietly and Mickey looks at him.

"What do you mean you should?" Mickey asks.

"I should let you go. Set you free. I'm crazy, you look at me and you don't even see me anymore, you see this shit." He says pointing at his head. "You used to love me, I used to make you free and now I just cage you in with my shit. My crazy head. I've cheated on you, done things that are sickening and I should stand here and let you go. Let you be fucking happy, that's why I called you here." Ian says sadly, not able to look up at Mickey.

"Okay. That's bullshit."

"Huh?"

"You never let me go before. Why would you start now? You want me to be free? I'm free with you. Okay, so I get it, it's been hell. You're sick, and I...we didn't want to admit it. You weren't the only one pretending it wasn't real Ian. We both were because...we were so fucking happy finally and then you crashed. I should have taken you to a hospital then, maybe, but I just wanted to believe that I could love you through this shit, and I know that sounds crazy. I know that. And if you want to leave me because you don't love me, or you don't want me anymore, fine okay. But if you think leaving me is for me, you are fucking crazy because I love you so much it hurts, and you being sick doesn't change that, you leaving doesn't set me free, it breaks me." Mickey says as a single tear slips down his face.

"I...I don't want to break you. I just...I need...you to look at me like you used to. Not like I'm gonna break every second. That fear in your eyes, it's so crippling because I do love you, so damn much. And it hurts me to know I'm doing that to you." The tears were freely flowing from both men now. They didn't know what this was, a breakup, a makeup but one thing was for sure, it was honest. It's what they needed.

"Want to set me free? Get better. Don't do it for your family, or even me really. You don't need me to tell you something's not right don't you? He's still in there...the man that I fell in love with, I can see it in your eyes. You say you're not broken, that you don't need to be fixed, maybe that's true. That sickness inside of you is not you Ian, it's a part of you, sure, but it's not you. I know you. The Ian I love is right there." Mickey says and touches Ian's chest. "Fuck your head, Ian is in here. You need me to walk away? Is that what you want? Not your illness, not the you that needs nobody to give a damn about you so that you can stop the meds, but you. The real you?"