Love in Healing

Chapter 11

Chandra opened her eyes slowly as if measuring how much light she should let through her pupils. Her eyelids felt heavy as if weighed down by something really heavy! Her body caught up with her brain at last and she felt the stiffness and then the awful memories came rushing back! Luigi! A moan escaped her stiff dried lips and she tried to move.

"Stay still. I need to get the doctor."

Chandra tried to focus on the voice and finally did. The nurse's scrub appeared to be too dazzling and she blinked the flecks away. "Where am I?" she whispered.

"IN the hospital honey and I am happy to see you awake." the woman told her with a kindly smile.

"How long?" she croaked.

"Two weeks. Pastor Mitchell and your sister and others from the church were your constant visitors."
"Where are they?"

"It's the middle of the night and we told them to go on home. Now I really must go and get the doctor."

"Wait! Please. My face?"
The woman looked at her sympathetically. "The swelling is still there but it will go down eventually. It's a wonder that dreadful man did not kill you."

Chandra felt the tears trickling down her cheeks.
"Oh my dear I am so sorry!"
"Chandra shook her head. "Please call my sister."

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"She is awake." Caroline had waited until it was morning to call with the news. She was on her way there and then she would be going to work.

"That's good news." Pastor Gary said briskly. Caroline had a feeling he was trying to hide what he was really feeling. She had been transferred to the local hospital for two weeks and he had been a regular visitor to see her.

"Will you go and see her?"
"No."
"She is going to ask for you. What should I tell her?"

"Tell I wish her a speedy recovery and she is in my prayers as well as the rest of the congregation."

"Pastor Gary-"
"I have to go now Sister Caroline."

Gary hung up the phone and leaned back against the chair, closing his eyes wearily. He had told his mother and sister that after she woke up he was not going to see her again and he meant it. She had broken him and he had no intention of allowing it to happen again!

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"I am sorry," Chandra murmured wearily as her sister took her seat next to the bed.

"For what?" You had no idea that the man you were seeing would try to kill you did you? How could you know something like that?"
"I ran away and I was almost killed again." she turned her head away. The nurse had finally showed her a mirror and she had looked in horror at the puffiness and the ravages there. The doctors had assured her that after the swelling went down she would start to look like her old self again or maybe close.

"I made a mistake," she whispered as she turned to look at her sister. "I left you in your time of need and never looked back. God is punishing me."
"God does not punish us the way we deserve," Caroline gentled her voice. "You made a mistake Chan and it is going to take time for you to get over what happened to you."
"How are you?"
"Doing quite well. The chemo and prayers are helping."
"Where is he?"

They both knew who she was referring to.

"I called and told him that you were awake and he said to wish you all the best."

"I hurt him." Chandra murmured.

"And yet he drove us to New York and stayed with you the entire time. He also visited you here every single day. i guess he is a sucker for punishment."

"I don't deserve a man like him."
"So that's why you picked a man who beats women because he gets off on it. A pretty face with an empty shell inside," Caroline said grimly.

"I wanted to get over Gary."

"Did you manage to do that?"

Chandra shook her head and felt the tears again. "I am so sorry!"

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"Are you going to be okay?" Caroline asked her anxiously as she plumped up her pillows. She had been discharged from the hospital just this afternoon and told that she should recuperate at home. This time Caroline was not going to hinge everything on her sister staying. She had done so before and she had just up and gone leaving her scattered and crushed.
"Go!" Chandra waved her away. "I have this novel I have been hoping to read so I will just spend the day doing that."

"The police wants to talk to you honey."
"I know. Marco called me and told me. I am going to have to give a statement."

"Are you up for it?"
"I want him put away for what he did to me. I won't have him doing it to another woman."

"Good for you. Whenever you are ready."

"Thanks Caro." Chandra said quietly.

"You are welcome." she turned to walk away. "he is never going to come unless you call him."

"I hurt him too much Caro. I cannot face him right now."

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"Are you going to see her?" Gillian demanded.

"Good day to you too Gilly," Gary said dryly.

"I have no time for pleasantries Gary. She hurt you and I need to know you are not going to run back to her like a puppy to its faithful master."

"I like puppies."

"Gary!"

"Gillian it's none of your business. I can take care of myself."

"I am not so sure about that." she muttered. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I have a sermon to write and things to do. Stop worrying."
"I cannot help it. You are the only brother I have."

"I love you too," he told her in amusement.

"Well then take care of yourself."

Gary hung up and stared off into space. It had been two days since she had been discharged and he had to almost physically restrain himself not to fly out there to see her! He wanted so much to be with her that he was having a hard time sleeping at nights. He had not moved on as he had told himself that he would. How could he move on when he loved her so much? He wanted to protect her and be there for her. But he could not understand why she would allow something like that to happen to her! he had offered her his life and he would never have hurt her, yet she had turned it down and gone with someone who had hurt her physically and emotionally. He got to his feet and went to pour himself a glass of water. He had to move on and he was going to double up on prayer to help him do so!

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She picked up her phone and searched for his number. So many times when she had been with Luigi she had thought about calling him but had decided against it. She had left him and had turned his offer of marriage down. She closed her eyes and remember his lovemaking. He had taken her to such heights of pleasure that she had never been able to experience that with Luigi. "Oh God what have I done?" she whispered achingly. "How am I going to show him how sorry I am? Will he ever forgive me?"