The King's Gamma (#Wattys2024)

One - Moonwalk and Mayhem

MACEY

"Wake me up, when September ends!" I nodded my head along with the beat, my fingers drumming an accompanying rhythm against my thigh as I walked down the street towards the bakery where I worked. The music pulsed through me, making it impossible to keep still - first a skip, then a shuffle, then full-on dancing as the song changed. When my favorite bassline hit, I closed my eyes and launched into my best moonwalk across the crosswalk, only to collide with something large, metallic, and decidedly not part of the sidewalk.

I stumbled sideways, catching myself at the last moment, and glared at the offending object - a massive midnight blue truck that had rudely interrupted my performance. My cheeks puffed out in irritation as I huffed, "Well that's just perfect. Awesome mood officially ruined and what was definitely going to be my greatest moonwalk ever stopped mid-stride." I circled the vehicle, running my hand along its shiny surface. "What the actual hell, dude? Do these white lines mean nothing to you? That little glowing pedestrian symbol? Or did your big fancy... whatever this is..." I knocked on the hood, "suddenly grow legs and forget basic traffic laws?"

Two towering men emerged from the truck - both golden-skinned, black-haired, and dressed in suits that probably cost more than my monthly rent. I barely registered their faces, too busy examining the truck's paint job for scratches.

"I believe it's called a Mercedes," the one on the left said, his strange accent curling around the words with obvious amusement.

"You are in the way, pest," the other snapped, his identical accent doing nothing to soften the insult.

I whirled to face them, my hands already flying in animated gestures. "Do you see these lines? Right here?" I stomped on the crosswalk for emphasis. "And that light up there?" I pointed wildly at the pedestrian signal. When neither responded, I threw my hands up. "No? Then the problem is crystal clear - you must be legally blind!"

The scowling one's mouth fell open while his companion appeared to be fighting a laugh. I zeroed in on the slightly friendlier one, planting one hand on my hip while the other pointed accusingly. "Listen, Buffalo Sam, if your grumpy friend here can't see basic road markings, don't you think it's your responsibility to drive? I mean, correct me if I'm wrong - which I'm not - but there are actual laws against blind people operating vehicles. And hitting a pedestrian in a crosswalk during their right-of-way? That's at least attempted manslaughter if I'd been seriously hurt. But more importantly," I emphasized with another wild gesture, "you interrupted what was shaping up to be an award-winning moonwalk! That's just fundamentally rude."

As if on cue, a third man emerged from an identical Mercedes that I hadn't even noticed pull up. "What's this about now, Renaro?" he asked, joining the growing crowd on the sidewalk.

I sighed dramatically and crouched beside the offending vehicle, fingers tapping impatiently against the running board. "Since Mr. Magoo here shouldn't be driving and you all clearly enjoy flouting traffic laws, I've got the perfect solution." Without further ado, I grabbed the step bars and heaved, the truck groaning in protest as it lifted clean off the ground. A quick adjustment of my grip, a deep squat, and one powerful jump later, the Mercedes was sailing through the air to land with an earth-shaking crunch on a nearby rooftop.

Dusting my hands off with satisfaction, I turned to the trio of stunned men. "Now, now, no need to look so shocked. A simple 'sorry for almost killing you and ruining your dance' would have kept your precious truck safely on the ground. So!" I gave them a mock salute. "I bid you good day and sincerely hope the rest of your journey is less... vehicularly challenged."

With that, I turned on my heel and continued down the street, the music in my headphones seamlessly transitioning to the next song as if nothing had happened.