Beautiful

Chapter Sixteen

March 5th

No time

Some party

~Niall~

Plan failed.

I wanted to go to Mullingar in two days, yeah? So... I go to a party with the lads. Me and alcohol don't mix very well.

Elle's house

Too late to comment other

~Elle~

I don't know why I was doing this. I dialed Niall's number anyways. I'm going to London with him. I'm going to tour with him. I love Niall and there's nothing I can do to stop the hole in my chest from growing besides... Simply being with him.

It was ten in the morning where he was, so he should answer. After three rings, there was a "Hello?" But... That's not Niall's voice. "H-hello?" I stammered, confused. I pulled the phone from my ear. Niall's number, yeah. "Who're you?" The girl asked. Hm. "Niall's girlfriend." Might as well lie to get the truth.

"What? Niall? Oh my God. No shït. Ni, wake up, you twat. You didn't tell me you had a girlfriend!" And I hung up.

~~~

My body was shaking uncontrollably. I finally placed the razor blade on the counter and closed my eyes, trying to steady my breathing. I was having a panic attack. I knew it for all the times I've seen Niall have one. But no one was here to help steady my breathing.

My phone rang again. Niall. He'd been calling all day. I had to answer, but not to hear his explanations. He wasn't dating me, he could do what he wanted.

I slid the answer button and immediately I heard Niall sigh in relief when he heard me breathing. But then he caught on. "Elle? Love, are you crying? Please don't cry, I didn't mean to.... We aren't together, I... Elle? Elle, what's wrong?" "Can't.... Breathe," I choked out. And full panic.

"Okay, Elle, stop. I'm calling an ambulance okay, baby? I'm gonna go-" "No." "Why not?" "Cuts..." "Cuts? Fück, Elle, were you cutting again?! Holy crow... Okay, baby, I need you to breathe," Niall said, his velvety voice lowering. "In through your nose, out through your mouth, okay? Breathe, come on." I was trying, I really was, but I was getting dizzy. The room was spinning. "Sing?" I asked. "Yeah, okay... Circles, we're going in circles.... Dizzy's all it makes us-" I let out a choked laugh because I really was dizzy- "We know where it takes us, we've been before, closer, maybe looking closer, there's more to discover, find out what went wrong without blaming each other." I heard his laugh in relief as my breathing steadied. "Niall, pl-" "Think that we got more time, when we're falling behind-" "Okay," I breathed.

"Okay, I'm on the way to the airport now, I just got a back together, I'm taking the next flight to Mullingar and-" "What? No, you can't come here." "Why not?" "What about that girl?" "What girl?" "The one you slept with." Niall sighed. "Elle, I was drunk, I-" "So if we got together and you got drunk, you may go out and cheat on me?" "No! There's a difference! We-" "Thanks for your help, Niall. But this time, when you show up at my door, I'm not answering." And I hung up.