Your not alone

Chapter 1

Everyday started out the same, I woke up and showered and got my school clothes on and done some of my chores. I walked to school with my sisters and brother. I didn't like school because I was always bullied and I didn't stand up for myself I just took it, I always thought I deserved it because that's what they always said so I believed them. My oldest sister Emily was a junior and I was a freshman. I didn't think about boys in school because I was more worried about completing high school and getting out of school. But that's all changed. Emily and her friends was trying to hook me up with a boy they hung out with, his name was Frank. He was a sweet guy but I just wasn't ready to date. After school we would always walk home and we would finish our chores then i would do my homework. After homework I would watch tv with my grandma and then cook dinner for the family. My dad worked day shift as a mechanic and my mom worked as a manager at night at a restraunt. My dad would always go pick up my mom around eleven at night sometimes we would still be up watching tv and finishing dishes from supper. One of the guys that worked with my mom at the restraunt would come over every know and then and hang out. I did have a crush on him I thought he was cute. His name was john. He was a senior in high school.
       On this day I woke up like any normal day, just like I always done nothing felt different. Nothing seemed off. I just thought it was a normal day. We all walked to school and after scho we would walk home and do the chores and homework. John had come over to hang out with me and Emily. When my dad left to get my mom he was still there didn't think anything of it, it was usually normal. I was getting tired and told Emily that I was going to bed I walked to our room and my little sister Sarah was asleep in her bed and my little brother Fred was down stairs asleep in his room. As I was getting in bed I heard the door open and I noticed it was john I asked him what he was doing and he had told me that he wanted to tell me bye. After he said bye, I felt like something was wrong, a few seconds later he started touching me places that was inappropriate and I had asked him to stop several times. He kept going and he leaned in and whispered in my ear "Don't resist it you know you like it" I told him "NO" again and he kept going. I eventually just went numb and I didn't know what I done wrong and I thought "Why me." After he was done he told me to walk him to his car I did because I was scared that he might try and do something to my sisters. I thought the faster I get him out of the house the better my sisters will be they will be safe. Once we got to his car he pulled his pants off and forced me to give him a blow job. I told him "NO" several times and I hear him say to me " you scream ill hurt you" so I didnt. It seemed like it went on for hours. Finally finished I was in tears and didn't know what to think. I walked in the house and Emily was asleep I got in bed and just played there and cried. No matter how bad I wanted to I wanted to tell so.done but I just couldn't i was so scared ofvehat he might do to me I couldn't do it. Finally after carrying this secret for a week I told Emily what happened. She told dad and he asked me about it and I told him what happened I cried so hard and I wanted my mom so bad. She was at work and told us to go to the police. I got there and the police asked me a Lot of questions and and I filed the report out. I couldn't bring myself to go to school knowing he was there too. When I did finally go back to school Fred would walk me to my classes and make sure I got there safe and I would make sure I got home as well. Eventually we had found out that the detective that was working my case had said that there was not enough evidence to prove that john had raped me. And he was never arrested or never taken to jail I was so mad and hated myself even more. I was glad when school need and he was out and I passed my freshman year. As the years had gone by I had accepted the fact it happened and I forgave him for taking advantage of me. And I came to say it wasn't my fault. No matter how hard you want to believe it when you say it. Its hard but you have to keep saying and keep believing it. Because its not your fault. No one deserves to get sexually assaulted. Just don't hold it in, tell someone about it get something done about it. Your not alone family and friends are always there to help in cases like this. Family is a big support group and good to count on. Don't listen to the bad thoughts you have. Always remember everything happens for a reason you might not know why it happens or why you but you will eventually find out why. I learned a valuable lesson to not fall for the first guy you see or meet, its not worth the heartache or pain. My first grade teacher always told me god doesn't give you more than you can't handle and he don't. I lost faith for the longest time but came to realize he the reason I pulled through I got past it and made me the strong independent women I am now. Sexual assualt don't only happen to women it can happen to men as well. And no matter the sex of the person its not ment to be laughed about or homes about. People get hurt by this and some people live with it for there entire lives and never tell a soul. Always remember "YOUR NOT ALONE" find a good support system and talk to them about it. I always found writing a good go to for me. The more I write the better I feel. I don't see myself as a victim any more one we myself as someone who is strong and who pulled through and I didn't let it bring me down. It made me tougher. My story has a happy ending to it. I eventually moved on and dated,  I am now married and have a beautiful baby boy. And as my son gets older ill always be by his side to talk. Ha ing caring parents makes a different. Don't let your kid feel like they are alone talk to them and ask them question about there days. I hope someday my story will encourage people to come out and say they can now talk about what happened and come open about it. It takes time but let your story be told inspire the next person to come out and tell theirs. Inspire someone to do something about it. Inspire the next person to become a cop and put a end to the suffering of people living in this world knowing the guy that raped them is still out there. He still scares me to this day I see him I walk the other way. It bothers me that he went free but it was what was ment to be and I have come to live with it. I hope my story will inspire someone else.

(Plz comment on what you think. Just no negative comments I've been writing this story since I was 14 when it happened and several years later finally getting it out in the open.)