On The Verge Of Insanity.

Chapter 3: One. More. Step.

I sucked in a deep breath. Its been years. To long. So long he probably wouldn't even remember me. How could he? He was robbing banks, going on killing sprees, and planning prisons break 24/7. Does he even sleep?

The Joker was magnificent. His smile bright and cunning. His laugh deep and contagious. His jokes hilarious. He was perfect. Well, other then the killing. Well, maybe even then.

It may seem impossible, but he was my first crush. I always had boys liking me. And yeah, I dated a few before the joker. If I'm honest I was dating a goody-two-shoes when I met the joker. And when I got settled again. . . I never looked at Mark the same.

He wasn't daring. His blond hair was too blond. It needed some green. His eyes were blue. To blue. They needed to be brighter. His grin was not grilled. It needed some silver. He just wasn't the same. None of them were. The joker had my heart. Weather he knew it or not.

I looked up at the clock. It was almost nine thirty. It was almost time to see him. I wanted to smile and laugh. Yet, I was also afraid. I shook my head trying to clear the questions bubbling in my head. I failed. Miserably.

Does he have a girlfriend?

Does he remember me? Miss me?

Did he have the slightest sliver of feeling toward me?

I got it, okay years upon years have gone by. And yes, he probably doesn't even remember me. Why should he? As soon as he killed my mom, he gave me a small fortune and I lived happily. And it seems he did too. Before the wackjob Batman locked him up.

I shook with fear. I haven't seen him is so long. I knew he must be different. Right? But if he was the same as before... That would be a dream. Protective, crazy, handsome as hell. Just thinking about how his bright green hair sways in the wind makes my heart race. I owe everything to him. He saved my life. Twice.

I knew my father would of killed me. And I knew my mother would have too. I grew up in a house of hell and he just barged on in like he owned the place to make my miserable life worth living. Can someone even do that? In every single way he was amazing. Sweet and before you say excuse me? Did you just say sweet? I mean it! He is sweet! How many man would go out of there busy bank robbing schedules to help a random girl! Not a lot! So yes, he is sweet.

I let out a sigh. It was almost time. I was afraid. Imagine if he didn't remember me. What if he hated me! He killed before. Why wouldn't he do the same with me as he has done with his other doctors? I shuddered.

"I don't get this!" I said angrily out load and threw my hands up in the air. They came down with a sharp snap on my desk.

I glared around my office. It was small and cramped. My walls were a ugly shade of eggshell. My floor was puke green carpet and my stone gray laminate desk stood out like a sore thumb.

I groaned. I was nervous wreak. How could he do this. Its been years. YEARS. Why do I still like him? He is just crazy. He killed my parents for gods sake! I watched the clock ticking. I should be going to his cell. All the doctors said they can smell your fear.

I took a deep breath getting up. It was scary. So very scary. Its been too long. So long you could say I'm crazy for missing him still. Thoughts were chasing other memories around my head. His voice, the way he laughed, the way he said my name. It made me want to swoon.

"Ms. Quinnzel?" A voice asked breaking threw my trance. I flipped around like a frightened rabbit then relaxed as I saw it was a guard.

"Yes?" I asked. I just wanted to go to the Joker. Yes, I was petrified. He could kill me. Very easily. I knew more about him then anyone else does. I don't know him well. But I know a bit. And no one knows him just a bit. I changed my stealing life. I could change his murdering life. Couldn't I? He would try. For me. At least I hope he would. I smiled. He was going to have a hell of a time getting to stay crazy.

I mean when you care about someone, they would try to change for you. That is assuming he cares about me. I felt a wave of calm wash over me as I looked at the guard.

"I'm here to take you to the Joker's cell." He said with a grin.

I laughed. "Let me get his file real quick." I turned around and reached for the files, but they got knocked off the desk. The guard pushed past me gently and then picked them up.

"Here you go." He said his green eyes sparkling with amusement. I smiled a embarrassed smile as I realized how charming he was.

"Thank you." We walked to the Jokers cell. The whole way all we did was pull corny jokes and tried to solve riddles. It was actually fun. Then I was at his cell door. I took a deep breath as I stared the door down. He was so close.

The guard grabbed my arm making me look up at him. "This guys crazy. No nut case is the sane, but this guy. Well, lets say he instills fear in all the other patients."

"I understand." I said calmly. I turned to the door as it opened. I took two steps towards it. I smiled. One. More. Step.