Broken (a sequel to Harvey's Fan Crush)

la

harvey's pov

i was on the plane on my way to la. i was going to record some music and do some interviews but i'd have a lot of free time to meet up with friends. i was staying with loren and her family like i usually do but this time felt odd. i haven't spoke to her much after the new years incident and i'm a little nervous to see her. i keep replaying that night back knowing that i screwed it all up. why couldn't i have just stayed loyal to amelia? ugh i keep kicking myself knowing that i could have prevented this whole thing by not replying to loren.

i arrived in la and saw loren and her mum waiting for me at the airport. i got in the car with them and almost immediately loren shuffled over towards me and started cuddling into me. i didn't know how to tell her to stop when i'll be spending the next week and a half with her so i slowly and awkwardly put my arm around her. it's not like it was with amelia, it's different. i want to be back with her not over here with loren. i think about texting her but i decide against it because i don't want to cause any more arguments, i should let her move on in life and away from me...

lorens mum took us out to eat at the hard rock cafe. i ordered my usual and sat scrolling through socials when i came across amelia's ig story. it was a boomerang of her on the train, she labelled her location and it was slough. i knew why she was there and my heart sunk. maybe she already had moved on. i still love her but i hurt her too much, too much to ever fix.

for the rest of the night i was a little down realising i let the best thing in my life slip through my fingers. i was lying down on the sofa while loren went live and did some musicallys scrolling through instagram as usual. i slid into a few gcs saying hey to my fans, they always make me feel better because their love and support drives me to make better music and videos for them. loren skipped over to me and cuddled up to me on the sofa and when her mum walked in to talk to us she told her to take photos of us. i tried to act like i didn't mind but i wished it was amelia i was cuddled up with. her mum snapped a few shots of us and then loren took her phone back looking at the photos before deciding to post one.

the feelings that ran through me as she hit upload weren't good. i felt bad for amelia if she saw this and i felt even more confused about my feelings. i felt guilty more than anything for everything that happened.

i was chilling watching tv when my phone started to buzz mentally so i flipped it over and checked it, it was the gc us boys have

rye🔥: bro, erm idk how else to put this but amelia's just walked out of the flat in tears

andy🌵: man she's a mess right now

me: why what's happened? is she okay?

rye🔥: no she's not

andy🌵: she saw lorens post and well she walked out of the flat crying

me: oh. did anyone go after her?

rye🔥: yeah don't worry someone did

me: what am i meant to do?

andy🌵: idk mate but maybe ring her tomorrow or something and talk to her?

me: sure i guess but i doubt she'll want to talk to me

rye🔥: i know you still love her

me: i know i do but it's clear she's moved on

andy🌵: well i'm pretty sure she still loves you but she's trying to move on because she thinks you have with loren

i didn't reply for a while until a got a new text

rye🔥: just to let you know she's back by she's not sleeping in here

andy🌵: i've just stuck my head out of the room and she looks worn out and upset

me: i'll try call her tomorrow

rye🔥: good

to be continued