Dear Niall,
July 28
"So what did happen?" You asked, laughing.
"What?"
"You know," You said. "You and the guy. What'd you say his name was? Louis, right?"
"Oh," I nodded. My mouth suddenly felt really dry. "I um, maybe I shouldn't, I mean, I just-"
"Whoa," You put your hands up like you were surrendering. "You don't have to talk about it, you know. I just was curious, that's all."
"Sometimes," I took a deep breath. "Sometimes one person wants to do something, but someone else doesn't want to. And sometimes the first someone is stronger or smarter or more powerful, and the other person just has to learn to live with it." I tried to explain, but there were tears in my eyes and everything was blurry and my hands were sweaty and my mouth was so dry.
"Oh," You said. I think you understood. "Elle?" You tilted my chin up so that I was looking at you, except I couldn't look you in the eye, so I just looked around your kitchen, trying to focus on the hum of your refrigerator. "Elle," You said, interrupting my thoughts. "Look at me, Elle." I closed my eyes and took a long, deep breath before finally opening my eyes and looking right at your blue ones. "You need to tell someone about this."
"There's more." I blurted.
"No," You said, your voice higher than usual. "No, please, no."
"Sometimes," I choked. "One person does something wrong, and even though they don't know what they did, exactly, they know they had to have done something. So another person, who they might even love very much, gets angry, and maybe violent. And so the first person, who did something wrong, forgives them again and again, because they love them, and that's what people who love each other do."
"You-you love him?" You asked, your voice cracking.
"I thought I did."
"Did he love you?" You asked.
"No," I admitted. "No, he never loved me."
"I love you, you know." You said, pulling me to your chest and resting your chin on my head. "So much."
"I know, Niall. I love you, too."
Love,
Elle
Dear Elle,
July 28
Oh my God. Oh, my God. I'm going to fucking kill Louis.
He touched you. He touched my Elle. He touched you and he fucking hit you. Oh my God, I can't believe he hit you. I'm going to crush him. I'm going to fucking kill him.
I am so sorry. Elle, I'm so sorry. I can't believe I let this happen. I should've been there, I should've been there and helped you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Love,
Niall
sorry about any mistakes but my editor is currently on vacation so suck it up
