poems.

quiet.

you told me
I'd be quiet
not knowing how to define my silence

I told you
that's just my style

I turn the lights off
I'm that type of person
who's closing the door'n
opens the window,
cause the stars are telling stories
you just have to listen carefully

you told me I'd be quiet
and I smiled,
cause I am the deep water
everybody's talking about

so we came to a point
me and you
starting to seperate
what's left of us
and all of me
screamed for a hint
like a smile
I was longing for a tip
to know how much
I meant to you,
but nothing

so I became quiet as fuck

you can listen 
to my tears
while reading this,
it's possible to hear me scream
while writing this letters
and
to be honest
you already read me moaning

so
don't tell me I am quiet
I'm the wildest storm
you've ever seen,
the personification of tension,
a story you'll never read 
and
even more than you
I too
can't get enough from it

maybe I'm a little drunk
as always
maybe I'm driving home
and started writing 
just because I thought of you
as always

I feel confused

and my silence
becomes louder
don't think I'm repeating my past
looking through the years
I re-write my highlights
and don't get me wrong
I know where my heart belongs
I just have to say
that
right now

while you're at some place
not too far away from me
I'm thinking of you
and I want you to think
about it, 
about me,
cause music isn't the only passion
that's connecting,
drinks aren't the only things
we shared
and
at the same time
I turn up my volume,
skip the track to the next beat
and start to believe
that I don't know what to say

maybe all of this writing 
emptied my head
maybe non of it will ever do

but I write and write and I write
the only thing surrounding me is
black ink
on a paper
time's driving into the night
and it's getting later and later
just as you and me,
but I won't leave
I'm still thinking of being 
too quiet while we kiss,
still tumbling,
healing from the last shots you gave me,
still breathing

I don't like things being unspoken,
ironically
cause that's the fucking story of my life

I only mention the parts
that I don't talk about,
but I'm still waiting for the day
you come around
and we talk about the truth
maybe we won't talk,
maybe we will kiss
and laugh
and kiss again
maybe you will rip me apart,
but that's okay,
cause I really want it that way

and I know
you're confused,
cause it was so goddamn silent,
but look at me
here I am
-screaming-
I'm shouting out loud

what are you waiting for?