Moving on - g.d

E i g h t e e n

Engulfing my boyfriend in a huge, warm hug, we both shook as sobs racked our bodies and we allowed our emotions to flow freely in front of each other.

"I should've stopped him! I should've realised what he was about to do! I'm his fucking twin Cass and I didn't see his intentions! I'm supposed to know him more than I know myself but I'm so stupid." He spat, the hatred for himself so obvious that it almost broke me.

"Don't beat yourself up Gray, I'm his best friend and I didn't realise either..." I reasoned as he shrugged, looking down in dismay as I felt helpless, not able to make him feel better.

Sighing, I pushed myself from the bed and made my way to the draws, emptying them before folding the contents into my suitcase. I ignored Grayson's gaze burning into me and continued, not stopping until I'd zipped my suitcase, everything neatly packed ready for the flight tomorrow.

Grayson said nothing, only making his way over to me and kissing me roughly. At first, I kissed back, but then I noticed, the passion wasn't there, I was only being used as a distraction right now. His hands roamed by body but it wasn't with the feather-light touch, it was a needy touch that wanted to feel everywhere as quickly as possible.

Slowly pulling away, I gasped for air, "Gray, I can't, not right now."
"Come on Cass, I need you, let me do this please..." He begged, his hands showing no signs of stopping as I began increasingly worried.
"Gray, no." I said frantically as his eyes were dull and my heart rate quickened.
"Please... stop..." my voice cracked and it was though that instantly jerked him back to reality. His eyes widened in realisation and he rested his forehead against mine.
"Fuck.. what was I thinking? I'm so sorry..." he pleaded, his voice now rich with emotion as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry baby, I'm so so sorry..." he whispered, wiping the salty tear from my cheek as his eyes saddened at the sight before me.
"I love you and I'd never hurt you, I can't risk losing you now I don't have Ethan." He rasped as I shook, still in fear of my own boyfriend.

"I-I need to be alone..." I said quietly, each word holding fear which I hated. Grayson was definitely upset at this but he didn't stop me when I walked out the door for air, and for that, I was grateful.

I made my way downstairs and I found myself going to a room number I had memorised. After 3 short knocks the door was answered and as soon as jack absorbed my tearful appearance, I was wrapped up in his arms.

"Cass, I hate seeing you upset, what's wrong? Still Ethan?" He asked kindly, pulling me gently into his room as he rubbed my back soothingly.

"A bit but something else just happened, I don't want to talk about it, I just want to feel safe and you make me feel safe Jack..." I admitted as he eyes softened and he sat beside me, pulling me closer to him.
"Well I'm glad you can trust me." He said quietly with a small smile.

I nodded and didn't say anything, only staring ahead blankly at the wall.
"It'll all be okay, as soon as we get home, I'll keep you preoccupied with meetings about your makeup line." He smiled as I forced a sad smile back at him weakly.

Suddenly the door knocked and jack let out an over dramatic sigh before going to answer the door and I could hear his loud voice from where I was sat.
"Oh so you're the reason behind her upset? What did you do oh great and mighty boyfriend?" Jack asked sarcastically as I heard Grayson's strained voice recall the moment again, making my shudder as I recalled it.

"Well, I must say that you're absolutely crazy if you think that I'm going to let you see her right now, especially after that. I'll let her come back to you in her own time."
Grayson interrupted him then but Jack quickly shut him down.
"I don't care that you have the hotel room for 2! If she doesn't want to go back to face you tonight then I'll happily sleep on the couch so she can sleep here and feel reassured!" He snapped as Grayson remained silent, he couldn't fight with that.
"Okay," he finally admitted, stalking off as Jack shut the door and came back over to me.

"We're like fire and rain, he drives me insane, but I can't stay mad at him for anything." I murmured as my manager suddenly sat bolt upright.
"Oh my gosh! That could totally become song lyrics!" He exclaimed, singing the words I had muttered only moments ago and I had to admit that it sounded pretty good.
"I'm not really into music." I sighed, I was awful at singing and I couldn't play any instrument to save my life.

"Well you should definitely song write!" Jack encouraged as I shook my head.
"It's fine, I like just modelling." I shrugged, standing up and getting myself some food since my constant crying had made me increasing hungry.
Opening the tub of ice cream, I instantly dug my spoon in, savouring the icy snack as it soothed my raw throat.
"Glad to see that this doesn't ruin your appetite." He winked as I smiled sheepishly. Who doesn't love ice cream?

"And just so you know, Grayson looked absolutely wrecked. I'm not justifying what he did, that was awful but he does love you."

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End of chapter!
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-Ky 💜