Making it Home (Home book 2)

Part 18

I freeze staring at my mom and feeling my breath catch in my throat.  "What?"  I say quietly, thinking I heard her wrong.

"You're pregnant are you?"  She repeats shifting closer to me and squeezing my hand.  "Lydia?"  I jump up and race to the toilet before once again emptying the small contents of my stomach.  My hair is pulled back from my face as my mom sits behind me.  

I stand and brush my teeth once again before sliding down the wall in the bathroom, my mom sitting on the edge of the tub watching me.  "I-"  My vision grows cloudy and I blink fighting back the dizzy feeling.  "I can't.....I don't know."  I lean my head back and breath in and out, trying to calm myself down.  

"Lydia, honey.  How long have you been getting sick?"  I shake my head and lean forward shoving it between my knees.  "Honey, it's okay if you are.  Tyler's here.  He loves you, we all do."  

I feel my breathing growing shallower and faster, the signs of an oncoming panic attack.  Somewhere in the growing fog I hear my mom talking, but it sounds far away and warped.  I pull my knees closer to my chest keeping my arms wrapped tight around them, and my head held firmly in place.  Suddenly there's a warmth next to me and I hear a different voice breaking through the fog.  Tyler.  I hear him telling me to count my breaths and focus on his voice.  Some time later I feel the world around me stop spinning and slowly open my eyes, the earlier fogginess gone.  I lift my head, looking around and see my mom standing in the doorway chewing on her lip while my dad stands behind her with his hand around her waist.  I turn to the warm body next to me and nestle myself into his strong arms.  "You okay Dee?"  He asks quietly as he moves his hand through my hair, untangling the long length with his fingers.  I shrug and close my eyes resting against him.  "Come on darlin' lets get you to bed."  I start to move away to protest but he just stares at me before turning to my dad.  "Can you help her over to the bed?  I would but I can't help her and get up at the same time."  

My dad nods and reaches down for me, pulling me up beside him and carefully guides me back to Tyler and I's bed, helping to lower me down onto the soft surface.  I sink into the blankets not bothering to swing my legs up onto the mattress.  I watch as Tyler walks out from the bathroom, pausing next to my mom and offering her a hug.  He makes his way over to me and helps me move my legs onto the bed grabbing an extra blanket and tossing it over the top of me.  "I'll be right back Dee.  You be okay?"  I nod and close my eyes as he kisses my forehead.  

Laying in bed I close my eyes and try to tell my body to relax.  I open my eyes when I hear voices just down the hallway.  "It's my fault I shouldn't have started asking questions...."  My mom says and I can hear the sadness in her voice.  

"It wasn't you fault honey."  Dads voice echos down the hallway.  I hear Tylers voice cut in and listen more intently.

"He's right Baylor, it isn't your fault.  She's had a few panic attacks in the last week or so.  You didn't have anything to do with it." He pauses, and I shift my position so I'm laying on my side, "She'll be okay.  She just needs to get some rest, and to stop being so stubborn about them."  I hear footsteps walking farther away and the click of the front door followed by heavy footsteps coming towards the bedroom.  "I know you aren't sleeping Dee."  He says as he walks in and stops in front of me.  I scoot back in the bed giving him room to sit next to me, he slides in and lifts the blanket allowing me to move up towards him.  "You know your mom thinks your pregnant."  I nod against his chest and sigh closing my eyes.  "Why didn't you say anything?  We can handle it darlin' you know that.  We'd be okay."

I open my eyes and look up at him, "I didn't think of it Ty.  Mom just threw the idea at me....and I just."  I pull the blanket up over my shoulder moving closer to him.  "I don't know Ty.  I'm scared."

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