"HAHAHAHAHA!" Vince laughed that boomed around the four corners of the shop's first floor, "Seriously, Francis? Kabiyak ng puso mo?"
I sighed and massaged my temple, "Nireto ako ni Mama doon sa anak ng boss ng Papa ko. From what I remembered from the infos Mama gave me, Business Administration graduate daw yung babae. Mas bata daw sa akin, then she's heiress of their company. And oh! Kilala pala ako ng babae kasi nakikita niya yung works kong pinost ng mga ibang customers sa Instagram and aside from that, alumni daw ng Tarlac National High School, school mate natin, for short." sagot ko at saka inilipat ang pahina ng binabasa ko doon sa mini sketchbook.
"May nag-send ng message sa akin sa IG, I forgot her UN and baka siya yung tinutukoy ni Mama. In-stalk ko yung account niya at bahagya ko siyang namumukhaan. Kaso 'di ko makita buong pangalan." tuloy ko.
"Why don't you give it a try? Baka kasi sakaling mag-work out dahil baka siya na yung "the one" mo?" he asked then took a bite from his raspberry cake drizzled with chocolate.
"What if kung hindi kahit na nag-invest na rin ako ng feelings? It's hard that you gave all of your best but that best wasn't enough. Ang bakla man pakinggan but I believe in red string stuffs. I can't tie myself to the person who was meant to be tied down in another man. At doon pumapasok ang status na 'complicated'. Do you want to complicate things, Vince?" I asked then leaned on my chair, "Most of the arranged relationships doesn't really work out. Ganyan yung nangyari sa mga Tita ko."
"Nasa dalawang taong involved naman kasi 'yan, Francis. Kung ang iniisip n'yo lang ay ang isa't-isa, wala kayong magiging problema."
Napatingin ako sa labas ng glass wall at napaisip.
Vince spoke, "Hey, if you're afraid of trying because of the past happenings in your love life, try to move on from those, Francis. Nagmahal ka kasi sa maling panahon kaya ganyan ang kinahinatnan mo ngayon."
"Men only fall in love once in their lifetime. The rest ng babae ay natututunan na lang nilang mahalin. Pero iba pa rin kapag nahulog ka ng kusa－nang walang dahilan." I excused, "I'm sorry, but I can't."
Vince sighed, "Ano ba 'tong gagawin ko sa'yo, dude..."
"Do nothing, man. This is my own problem after all.
Marami pang sinabi si Vince pero hindi ko na siya pinakinggan.
I'm busy reading the rules I wrote and reminiscing the memories I once cherished a long time ago.
~*~
#2
WHEN YOU CAN, SUPPRESS
WHEN YOU CAN'T, ADMIT
Liking a person but confused? Ask yourself. If you can't see yourself being with him or her, it does mean that what you feel is nothing－plain attraction. But when everything still seemed to be unclear, 'wag pigilan ang mga nararamdaman, lalala lang yan. Never entertain unnecessary feelings unless you're already out of control.
The best way to end your suffering is to sleep. Not that you're trying to escape from your battling thoughts, you're just taking a rest. Pwede naman kasing balikan na lang. LOL.
AFTER a few game matches, nagdesisyon akong matulog na muna, para may lakas ako mamaya, which is a stupid decision dahil hindi ko naabutan ang game niya. She participated at the doubles match based on what I heard from Vince.
Ginising na ako ni Vince mula sa pagkakahiga sa bleachers at saka inayos ang aking sarili. The girl's usually quiet at wala na yatang balak pang magsalita, which made me smile unconsciously.
