Female Lycan

Chapter Three

The white, popcorn ceiling is what I've been staring at for the past hour. I didn't get any sleep last night. There was no way I could, not after everything that happened yesterday. I can hear someone rattling around in the kitchen, meaning they're up. I run my hands over my face with a small groan. I throw the comforter to the side and walk to the bathroom.

Stripping out of my clothes, I step into the shower. The warm water rolls over my skin and down the the cold tile. As I wash my hair, I think about what happened yesterday.

I met my mate, which should have never happened. Don't get me wrong, just like every other she-wolf, I dreamt of the day I'd meet my mate. The difference between me and the others is that I'm dangerous. Being my mate is dangerous. Even more so since he's an alpha. It'd put his entire pack in danger.

Alpha Valentino was livid when I refused to go home with him. I thought he was going to take me against my will when his Beta showed up. Johnson, his beta, reasoned with him. They left and then the questions began. One after the other McKenzie grilled me. I couldn't take anymore excitement for the day so I told them I was tired and went to my room.

I lay in bed all night, thinking about the events over and over again. At one point, I remembered him saying he's Lycan. Valentino is the last name of two of the original Lycans. It made sense when I realized who he was, Xander Valentino. The blonde haired, blue eyed god. Making it even more crucial for me not to be with him. My wolf whimpers at the thought and my heart hurts slightly.

The bond is already forming. With each day it'll get harder for us to stay apart. Harder for me to resist him. Painful even. Once we meet our mates, the females go into something called heat. It's like a human period but tremendously more painful. Our body temperatures rise to insanely high temperatures and our bodies feel like they're on fire. Everything is sore, getting out of bed is almost impossible. The only solace is to complete the mate bond through consummation. Until the bond is complete, the she-wolf will undergo a heat, once every month, each one more painful than the other.

I shudder at the thought and turn the water off. I towel dry my hair and then my body. Since the bathroom is connected to the room, I leave the towel on the hanger and walk into the room. I slip on a white sweater and tuck it into a high waisted, black skirt. I fight with a pair of black tights with a darker shade of black polka dots, finally getting them on. Finally, I slip on a pair of black booties and open the bedroom door.

I walk into the kitchen, where Kenzie stands at the stove and Mason sits at the counter. When I enter, they both look at me.

"Good morning guys," I smile and walk over to the coffee pot, grabbing a mug and pour the black liquid in. I add some honey and milk and take a sip of the steaming concoction. The twins watch me as I do so. I know what they want to say but I know they won't.

I sit next to Mason and then look at the two. "I can't be his mate.... I can't be anyone's mate. It's too-"

"Dangerous," Kenzie cuts me off and rolls her eyes. "Why do you have to hide? You're the most powerful being there is Annie!" She announces annoyed.

"Enough McKenzie," I bark. "I cannot show myself to others. I cannot have loved ones. I cannot have people who love me. There are people after me. They will do anything to find me. To have me. Even by killing everyone I love. That is why I cannot have a mate and why when I leave I won't be coming back," I whisper the last part but I know they both hear me.

"No!" Kenzie shouts. "That's enough from you. I don't care that people are after you. You've lived for centuries alone. You deserve this Annie. You deserve a mate. You deserve a family. You deserve friends who love you. You deserve people who are willing to die for you. And you can have all of that. You already have some of that as is," she tries to persuade me.

A single tear falls down my cheek and I hold my hand up to her. "Enough, I'm done talking about this. It won't happen. People will die and I'm not going to let that happen," I stand up and walk away.

I walk out of the front door, needing some fresh air. A hand grabs my wrist and I'm pulled into a strong body. "She's right, Annie. We're a big and strong pack, we can protect you," Mason says softly.

I look up at him and shake my head. "Please, my heart can't handle this right now. I just need to go for a walk."

He nods his head and releases me. I step off the porch, walking towards the forest. I pass the pack house on the way, giving it a quick glance.

"We can stay, they can keep us safe here," my wolf begs.

"I know they could but in doing that, they risk their lives for us. We don't want that," I say glumly.

"But our mate," she whimpers.

"He'll be okay. He's Lycan and he's gone this long without a mate," each word sends a pang to my heart.

She shakes her head and disappears to the back of my mind.

I step into the woods and a sense of serenity washes over me. I take in a deep breath and continue to walk. I walk until I find a meadow that was once full of wild flowers. I smile to myself and walk into the field. I sit on my butt and cross my legs as I lean back on my palms, my face up to the sun. It's cold but sunny today, making it bearable.

I smell him before I hear him and hear him before his shadow blocks the sun. I open my eyes and look up at the blue eyed man.

"Can I help you?" I ask nicely.

"Why?" He asks without moving a muscle.

"I'm going to need you to be a little more specific, why what?" I reply with an eye roll.

He sits down in front of me and watches me. "Why don't you want to be my mate?" He asks, trying to mask his hurt but failing.

My face falls slightly and I find myself leaning forward to comfort him. I place my right hand on his cheek as I look into his crystal orbs. He leans into my hand, never taking his eyes from mine.

"It's not that I don't want to, Xander. I can't," I speak softly. I go to pull my hand away but his own comes up and holds mine against his cheek.

"I'm going to need you to be a little more specific, princess. Why can't you?" He asks, using my previous question against me.

"I'm a human," I lie. "You're a lycan and an alpha. I'm not fit to be your Luna. Xander, you'll outlive me by thousands of years maybe even millions. Our time together would be so short compared to your life," I lie even more. I want to cry but refuse to. This is what I've always wanted, a mate, and I can't have that. I can't have him.

Xander stares at me for a moment, emotionless, and then says, "that's a whole bunch of bullshit, Annie." He stands up and then walks away from me. I watch him walk away as a few tears slide down my cheeks.