But it was just a twitch I guess.
I've watched the excitement on Tobias' face come, and leave when my eyes did not open. And the excitement I had left me too.
And it brought pain.
Not physical, but it brought me the pain of hating life, and if I did survive, I'd hate myself. Even though I saw Christina come through today, I know she's okay.
But I can't forgive myself.
And I'm going to go nuts inside my head. Me talking to myself. I'm going to wake up insane.
And I think I'm fine with that.
I mean I'll get the help I need, haha. Yeah right. You don't need help, there is many ways to fix this gut feeling.
Oh hello again, fellow thought. Mr. Thought loves to hate on me, and tell me how to fix it, by pointing to random sharp things in the room, or the hospital window.
I'm not sure why yet, but I'll figure it out soon enough.
Soon enough.
Right now, nobody is in this room, and I know it's weird, but I wish I could watch someone. Like I did with Tobias. Maybe feel happy for a little bit.
The doctor said I was in a grave state. So, I get to decide if and when I want to wake up. And so far, I haven't heard anything encouraging enough, so right now I want to die, but I'm holding on with some hope.
Some hope.
Geez I'm going to be messed up when I wake up. If I ever do, at least.
-laila
YOU ARE READING
Ink
Фанфик"He walked into my heart like he always belonged there Took down my walls and lit my soul on fire." The name of your soulmate is etched with ink on your wrist. A story of a girl who doesn't want to be broken, and a boy who can mend. some credits...
