E.A.T.O.N.

Chapter 13

Confusion filled my mind and swirled around as fast as a whirlpool. Anna? What? What has happened to her? I'm just hoping that she isn't dead.

"What about her?" I asked my mother.

My mother's eyes filled with worry, but the emotions quickly passed her face like they'd never even been there.

"Don't worry, Marcus, she isn't dead or anything." she chuckled at me. A wave of relief washed over my body.

"So what is it then, if she isn't dead?" I chuckled along now.

My father threw a glance filled with terror at my mother as she continued on, "Basically, she's become the new representative for Erudite."

The representative for Erudite?! The actual representative for Erudite?! I couldn't quite comprehend it. I knew that Anna clearly wasn't a fan of Abnegation, but that's a bit of a slap in the face. To me, and my parents.

"Right, okay." I didn't quite know how to react. A few years ago news like this would've brought me to tears, but my emotional state has drastically improved over time. I think that I'd finally accepted that it was Anna's life, not mine, and she could do what she wanted to do with it.

"So that's it?" I questioned. My parents had made it sound a lot worse than it actually was.

"Yes, that's all." My mother grinned at me before waltzing off into the kitchen.

For the first time in a long while, I didn't miss Anna. At all. There was no feeling of regret stabbing at my stomach, the regret that I should've helped her before it was too late, there was no pain clutching at my heart. I felt content, at ease, calm even. My mind had finally accepted that Anna was not selfless, she was a seeker of knowledge. I had finally accepted that she probably didn't grieve over the fact that she would never see me again, so I should do the same. Time is a great healer, they say, and for me that has certainly been the case.

To be fair to my parents, I'm not at all surprised that they completely overreacted the whole situation. My mental state definitely has not been the best since Anna left. I've developed anxiety and depression as well as anger issues. It used to be really bad. When I was around 13, I used to punch lockers, scream whenever people touched me and even yell at my parents. I regret it so much now, but I understand that it was completely out of my control. Mental health issues cannot be restrained or tied up with a leash, so I just had to ride it out and hope that there was light at the end of the tunnel. And there was.

When I was at my worst, my parents took my to a therapist. A psychiatrist, kind of. I went once a week, and to be honest it was life changing. My psychiatrist was called Simon and I have never met anyone more caring in my entire life. He listened to my problems and tried his best to find any sort of solution, although there wasn't often one. Simon watched me yell, watched me sob, watched me completely lose it, but yet he was still so caring. He really cared about me, I could see it. I saw Simon once a week for 2 years, and by the end of it I was a different person. My anxiety and depression weren't gone, but I'd learnt how to manage them.

After I'd finished therapy, I moved school. I wanted to start completely fresh somewhere where people didn't know me as the "kid with issues". I was no longer Marcus Who Punched Lockers, I was Marcus Who Hung Out With Kyle And Joe At Lunchtimes and Marcus Who Went To Art Club On A Friday and Marcus Who Picked People Up When They Fell. That school changes my life. Those people changed my life. Just thinking about it made me tear up. Before I collapsed on to the floor in sobs, I ran up the stairs into my bedroom, where I flopped down on my bed and stared at the ceiling.

It was a wonderful life for me.

Just perfect.

Just wonderful.

Until I heard the bomb go off.