Some things can change

•chapter 4• Wicked Game

[Izzy's P.O.V]

A weird, horrific, terrifying sensation ran cold through my veins in a matter of a split second, something was no longer right within the walls of the institute. My natural born Lightwood senses flared up immediately, although I have no brotherly parabatai bond like Jace and Alec I just know when something is wrong with either of them.

Thinking back inquisitively memories flashback in front of my eyes, reliving them in the very moment...
...The good
    The bad
     The ugly

But one thing that always stood out was Alec. My protector, my best friend, my big brother, in every reflection at the surface of an ocean of memories, he wasn't himself.
He wasn't his funny, joyful, adventurous brother that he was when we were growing up, but turned to a closed off, shy, and scared warrior trying to fight off the whole army of demons and terrors invading his brain, destroying all the strong and loved crops of his brain and leaving him there, alone to fend for himself.

I relax from my sudden paralysis, thoughts rushing through my mind like a whirlwind on a stormy night, I feel so bad for never noticing these things before and allowing my big brother to fend off his awful demons by himself, I look like a really shitty person compared to Alec.

He's always the one there for me when I needed him most, no matter when it was or what about.
He's always helping out Mum and Dad and the institute, making sure everything was in order and perfect to schedule.
He's always the brave soldier that leads his men out to battle, leading us into the unknown of demon hunting.
He's so brave, Alec is, fighting even the scariest of demons face on without even a slight shift in emotion towards it.
He was the one who kept everyone going when we no longer wanted to, when we had a bad day, a bad break-up, a bad injury, he was there. When max... when max passed he was the one lifting everyone's spirits, helping us cope with the idea.... the idea that our little baby brother was gone.

It was always him.

Always Alec.

How was I supposed to compete with that. 
Truth is I don't need to compete with that, I just needed to help get my big brother back to himself.
I noticed a large swarm of people towards the infirmary, all those close to Alec and Jace. I head there first, knowing they'd be together because of their parabatai bond.
Pushing past the sturdy wall of people, I conquer the enemy, leaving me speechless outside the infirmary doors.

Limp, pale, death-like, Alec lays there on a hospital bed hooked up to all sorts of medical equipment: a heart-monitor, an I-V drip, wires snaking in and out of his arms, an oxygen supply nearby, and more with Jace in a similar state close by him.

Seeing both of my brothers in such a helpless way leaves me shocked with life, a million thoughts patrol my mind, asking questions as to why they're both like this, what actually made Alec feel the way he did? Life itself is such a cruel wicked game to play, one wrong move and it's over pretty much.

By now, I've probably collected a pool of tears upon my cheeks, just seeing the result of an action on my brothers was heart-wrenching, I want to leave and never come back, never have to face my problems, never have to see my brothers in pain; I stay however, for them, for I am strong enough and they need me

Jace is awake, his golden eyes glistening along with his golden hair in the midst of the afternoon sun in New York, I head over to him quietly, him continuously assuring me he's okay, but I know Jace, he was hiding something.
I find out the truth,
the truth about Alec,
the truth behind his actions

Immediately a ring of fire lit up my stomach, raging with fury, anger and sadness. Why did he have to keep everything bottled up for so long?
I'm comforted by Jace and I slowly calm down, the fire still burning bright in the pit of my stomach, but this shouldn't be about the negatives.

I watch in awe and satisfaction as Jace's blood scars slowly fade into wispy white lines, then into nothing. Healing with no effort at all I thank Jace for being there for Alec when I was unable, and being there to save him from the Angel knows what.

I head to devil himself, laying there limp but awake, I see Alec's ocean blue eyes beaming up at me and suddenly an ocean rolls up onto the shores of my cheeks, seeing my brother in such agony and sorrow I just want to eliminate all of his pain so he doesn't have to face it himself.
I bury my face into the crook of his neck as I lean down and hug him, breathing in the scent of sandalwood and cotton, repeating over and over again how much I was truly sorry for not being there; before long being interrupted but his sweet but soothing snores as he'd fallen asleep peacefully.

A constant light flashes up in the corner of my eye, I see it's Alec's phone in which I go and look when he became Mr. Popular  turning it on I see at least a dozen missed calls and a shit tonne of messages from Magnus.