"No, Stay" I Looked at him deep in the eyes.
"Fine" He gave in.
"YEAH" I said. He crawled back into bed next to me. He put his arms around my waist and pulled me over to him. I layed my head onto his chest. "Your really pretty (Y/N)"
"Thanks but I really am not" I said blushing. He sat up indian style and pulled me up onto his lap so I was looking into his eyes. "Stop saying that You are the most beautiful girl I've ever met, and I mean that." I looked away in shame and looked down at my hands. "You are so beautiful, and smart and sweet, I know this about you and we just met" I kept my head down as a tear rolled down my cheek. "Why are you crying, Babygirl?" He asked pulling me into his chest.
"I'm sorry Jake........ Maybe you should just go" I said.
"I'm not going anywhere because I care about you and I want to know what's wrong" He said.
"Jake you are the sweetest guy in the whole world and you deserve better than me. I'm worthless and..." He cut me off
"Let me stop you right there. That is not true why do you think that? Who told you that?" He asked. I pulled my self away I turned away to ashamed to look at him and pulled my knees up to my chest and kept crying.Jake pulled me over to him but I just held onto my knees "(Y/N) Please don't shut me out"
"Can you please just go? I wanna be alone."I said out of anger.
"Fine but I'm right next door if you need me" he said leaving. After I heard him leave and I got up and walked into my bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror. I was so fat and ugly. There was a box of bathroom stuff on the floor next to me I rummaged through it and I found what I'd been looking for a blade. I slowly cut my wrists over the sink. I took a breath at the relief I felt after that I had been fighting the urge to cut since I moved in but I couldn't any longer. I let the cold water run over my wrists. I couldn't tell Jake about this he would be disappointed in me. I walked back into my room and I had a text from him J: Sorry if I made you feel pressured to tell me something you didn't want to or weren't ready for.
M:it's fine. I just want to be alone. I'll talk to you tomorrow.
I set my phone down I lay back. I hated this I wanted to tell him but he might not feel the same after he might think of me different. The tears were freely flowing from my face. I cried myself to sleep.
~skip to morning ~
I was awoken by a knock on the door. I figured it was Jake so I slipped on a hoodie to hide my wrists and got up to answer the door, and to my surprise it was Colby. "Hey " he said.
"Oh Colby hi" I said
"Omg have you been crying?" He asked.
"Maybe a little anyway did you need something?" I asked.
"Oh umm I hadn't heard from you and I was see if you were alright." He said.
"Wanna come in?" I asked.
"Sure"he said. We walked in and I showed him into my bed room he took a seat. I looked over at him.."So what do you wanna do?" I asked.
"I don't know.." he said. I don't what came over me but I had the urge to kiss him and I did it was intense. I pulled myself so I was straddling him. I pulled away "there's some thing about you (y/l/n) I can't resist." He said. I just nodded starring at him. He reconnected our lips and tangled my fingers in his hair. "Colby umm I'm a virgin" I blurted out I don't know why it just came out. "Oh " he said.
"Sorry that came out wrong..." I said blushing a little." No it's fine I'm glad you were ok telling me" his phone started ringing I rolled off of him so he could pick up. "Oh hey Sam" he said. I grabbed my phone and I had a text from Jake hey I wanna talk today no pressure I just wanna talk text me plz
M: I'll come over in about in hour
I turned my attention back over to Colby. "Hey sorry (y/n) I gotta go meet Sam to film. I'll text you later" he said.
"Ok bye Colby" I said as he walked over to the door. I decided to change and head over to Jake's house I put on a pit of black leggings and just left my hoodie on pulling it over my wrists. I knocked on the door and waited. He opened the door greeting me with his adorable smile. "Hi" he said.
"Umm hi" I replied.
"Uhh please come in" he said ushering me in the door and closing it behind us. He walked over and sat on the couch and patted the seat next to him. I sat down and looked at him. "I'm so sorry about last night I just want you to feel comfortable talking to me" he said.
"I do it's just......." I started I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.
"Just what?" He asked.
"No nevermind it's stupid" I said turning away from him.
"Nothing you will say is stupid to me" he said.
"If I tell you you might not like me anymore" I said very quiet.
"Ok that is a little stupid but only cause I like you and nothing will change that" he said making me smile.
"I just met you Jake and it's hard for me to open up to anyone." I said getting off the couch to leave. He grabbed my wrist trying to pull me close to him. But I whimpered in pain as soon as he grabbed my wrist. "Oh my god (y/n) did it hurt you" he asked worried. "Uh no I'm fine I'll talk to you later" I said leaving the apartment leaving him totally confused.
A/N
Hey guys hope you are enjoying this book sorry it's a piece of shit of a book but I'm trying.
