The Home Run

Chapter 3

When I arrived at the hospital I went through the emergency room since I knew it was the only place open. I made my way over to the elevator and hit the button for the sixth floor. Once the elevator reached the floor I quietly made my way into Alex's room. He was already asleep so I slowly walked around and sat in the reclining chair.

After a few minutes I realized how uncomfortable it was so I got up and tried to walk around and find an extra pillow, but there wasn't one in the room. As I started to walk out of the room I kicked the trash can and it fell over. I bent down really fast to pick it up and to make sure I didn't break a toe. Once I knew everything was ok and alex was still asleep I walked out of the room and towards the supplies closet. I looked around for a bit but I only found blankets so I grabbed a few of them and made my way back into his room and back over to the chair. I sat back down and used one of the blankets as a pillow and the other to cover up. I laid there for a while looking back and forth from the city outside of the window and the handsome man next to me. I don't know when it happened but I slowly drifted off to sleep.

I was woken up by the lights being turned on and a couple nurses coming into the room. I tried burying my head into my makeshift pillow to silence them out but it didn't work, so I opened my eyes and sat up. I noticed alex was already awake and the nurses were checking his blood pressure and pain level. All of that normal stuff. I watched the nurses every move just to make sure they had the right information. I don't have a problem with nurses, I'm actually good friends with them and I respect them a lot but when I have family or friends in the hospital my way of protecting them is to double check everything I can.  "Good morning Dr. Clark, you know visiting hours ended 6 hours ago?" Caitlin asked "I know but can you make an exception?" I asked and she nodded smiling. Once they got all of their information and left I tried to fall asleep again but I couldn't. "Why'd you come back?" Alex asked in his husky voice "I couldn't sleep. Do you want me to leave?" I asked looking at him "I've missed you" he confessed "I'm right here" I told him and then yawned and checked the time. 4 am. "No I mean before. It's been six years Anastasia. I've missed you" He told me "you could've found me any time" I told him and looked outside "I went back for you. i went back to school and asked jack where you were but he didn't know." He told me "I left and went to medical school. Brooklyn still had my number and she knew where I was"  I replied "I even went to your moms house in Michigan when I was there for away games. Did she tell you that?" He asked "I told her not to talk about you" I sat up and told him "you left me. You fucked me and left. I seriously thought you cared alex. You ignored my calls then changed your number. We had a baby and she died and you hid at the back of the crowd so I wouldn't see you. You can't possibly put everything on me." I told him as I started getting upset "you weren't just a fuck Anastasia and you know that!" He yelled "I love you. God can't you understand that? I love you. I still love you. I didn't ignore your calls I was on a plane and when I landed my phone was dead but I already changed my number. I wasn't trying to ignore you. Yea I was at the back of our daughters funeral because you didn't want me there. I had to be there. I just didn't want to make you mad. I needed to be there" he told me and he started fiddling with his thumbs. "I still love you too" I whispered softly. I noticed he sat up and moved over. "Come here" he said softly and held out his hand. I slowly got up and sat next to him. "I know it was hard for you but it was hard for me too. I lost my daughter and I didn't want to lose the love of my life too" he told me "alex why didn't you just tell me? I would've let you go anyway" I asked "I thought pushing you away was best. I wanted to tell you, so many times. But I knew once I told you we'd probably end things and I didn't want that. I wanted us to be ok. I didn't think and I know I'm not making sense but I'm so sorry" he told me "I'm so nervous around you. I want to hold you and kiss you but I'm scared that if I do you'll just hate me even more and I don't want that" he confessed "I don't hate you. I'm upset. You hurt me alex, I cried myself to sleep. God I sound so stupid crying over a boy but I love you that much. Just as I was ok enough to get out and do something we got into a car accident and the baby I didn't know I had died." I told him and a tear fell. "I only held her once. She was so small. Way too small, she never even had a chance." I told him and cried even more "I held her the day of her funeral. When you and your mom went to the restroom to calm down. She was so beautiful. She was just a little bigger than my hand" he said and raised his hand and looked at it "I've never seen anything so small." He whispered and I sniffled "it wasn't your fault. You didn't know you were pregnant and you didn't know that guy was going to hit the car." He told me and he wrapped his hand around my waist and pulled me to his chest. I immediately wrapped my arms around him and calmed down a little bit. "You almost died you know? Brooklyn was hysterical when jack called me. He told me you guys were in a car accident and you were hurt. He said you hit your head on the roof and your stomach on the seat in front of you. He said the amniotic sac broke and the baby died instantly, you lost so much blood. They were surprised you woke up so fast" he told me as he ran his hand through my hair and down my back. "You scared the shit out of me baby" he whispered and I looked up at him and saw he was crying. I whipped his tears and he laughed softly "oh gosh I'm such a mess" he said and took a deep breath and whipped his face with his other hand.

We laid there next to each other for a while in silence just thinking about the past. "I'm so sorry Stazie. I sound like a broken record but I really am." He told me "I was so mad at you. I mean I went through a phase when I was depressed but then the depression turned to anger. I think I took care of that when I shoved that tube into your lung though." I smirked and looked up at him "I don't know if it hurt more not being able to breathe properly or that tube going in. All I know is it felt so good to be able to breathe again" he replied and traced shapes along my arm. "So tell me about your downhill spiral. The drinking and girls" I told him "only if you tell me your fear of dicks" he replied "its actually a boring story. After I - we lost the baby, i tried with guys. Just trying to test the waters again. Well i went on a date with this guy and we went back to my house. As soon as his pants came off i yelled at him to leave. I couldn't stop thinking about what if i got pregnant with this random guy and lost the baby. I mean he had a condom and everything but i just want ready." i tokd him "so you haven't had sex?" he asked and i shook my head no. "well then I'm going to sound even more like a dick. A while after we lost the baby i went out with the team to get drinks. I wanted to forget so i kept thinking just have a drink and you'll feel better so i did. One led to several, and a group of women walked over. A couple of the guys were just going with it. Once i realized the alcohol wasn't working i started thinking just take her home and you'll feel better so i did. She wasnt even hot. I mean im sure she was to someone elss but i was so drunk i didn't care. Once everything was done I realized that didnt work either so i kept drinking and sleeping with her. I probably had sex like 10 times but it was only a couple girls and it wasnt good. My dick wouldn't even get hard a couple times. I can't believe I let myself get that bad." he confessed "i stopped sleeping around a few years ago and im still trying to get the drinking under control." he told me "im sure you'll get there. You stopped drinking before." i reassured him and he looked down at me.

I wanted to kiss him, and i guess he wanted to kiss me because he moved slightly and our lips touched. The kiss was gentle and slow but it was enough. Once we pulled away our eyes locked. "marry me" he said "what?" i asked "i want you to marry me. I mean obviously not right now, i cant even get on one knee. But i want to marry you one day" he told me. I sat up ans stared at him "i can't marry you" i told him "why?" he asked "well for starters I'm a doctor here in Boston and you play baseball in Washington" i told him "ill transfer" he told me "you can't just do that" i reminded him "but I'll do it. When the season is over ill see if i can transfer" he replied "what if you can't?" i asked "I'll quit. Im serious Anastasia i want to marry you. Six years was too long without you. I just found you, i can't loose you again" he told me. "what if i don't want to get married?" i asked "do you?" he aked "yea. Maybe one day" i replied "that's all I'm asking." he said "were not even together and you want to marry me?" i ask "I've always wanted to marry you" he said nonchalantly. "alex" i said "Anastasia" he smiled "will you just think about it?" he asked "maybe. But I'm not agreeing to anything" i old him "that's good enough for me" he replied smiling. His hand wrapped around my waist again and he carefully pulled me back down to his chest. I laid there and thought about what just happened. He wants to marry me? I smiled and closed my eyes and fell asleep.